I'm a Mormon

Last week my mother's husband died.
Since I never lived with the man,
in fact, only met him twice
I don't define him as
stepfather.

I don't have a relationship with my mother either.
For reasons not appropropriate to share,
she and I have never ever ever been close.
Not since I was nine years old.

Our relationship really went down hill when,
at 16 years old,
I made the decision to join the LDS Church.
My family was so against it,
I was literally kicked out of the house
with the clothes on my back.
I was a senior in high school.

Months later,
my parents had a change of heart
and they, along with my 4 brothers
were also baptized into the LDS church.
But shortly after,
my parents' feelings got hurt
and that was that.
My parents backed out as fast as they came in.
But I didn't.
And because I didn't,
I was asked to leave the home again.

It wasn't awful.
I lived with some remarkably loving families
in the Church--
and I learned so much in a short amount of time
from the Mothers of those households--
on how to run a home
how to cook (cheese grits-- yum!)
how to sew,
how to use a soft voice...
and many other things.
So my time in their homes
at their sides
in their circles of prayer
was a blessing.

It's been almost 32 years
since I made that decision
and have never once
not even once
regretted it.
The LDS Church is my family.
No matter where I've lived in 32 years
when I walk into a Chapel
I am home.
The members welcome and
love us into
their fold,
teach my children,
bring in meals when I'm sick,
pray with us,
rejoice with us,
share our burdens.
I don't know how other people
get thru their trials without this kind of support--
I'm not that strong.

So when my mother's husband was sent home
to die,
his needs exceeded her abilities.
And after many years of silence,
she emailed me and asked if I could
contact the church for her
to receive some help with her husband.

At first,
I was angry.
Angry...
I didn't want to ask  the Church
in her area to help her.
Not after what she'd put me through
all these years--
constant persecution for being a member,
rejecting me
rejecting my children
it was just too much.

Then my heart softened
and I looked up the contact information
for the Church in her small Texas town
and sent it to her
with the message:
If they can help, they will.
I knew that to be true.
That's just what my people do.

She made the call
and the floodgates opened...
members came in and blessed her life,
like I knew they would.
They buoyed my mother up
through this difficult time.

I looked up airfare prices--
too little notice= too expensive,
so I didn't go.

The ward there took care
and stepped-up in ways
that has overwhelmed
my mother
and my brothers
and their wives
as well as the other relatives--
none of whom are LDS.

In speaking with two of my brothers last night,
they spoke of their humility
and gratitude for a young Bishop
who presided over the funeral--
he'd never even met my mother or family
until Sunday night.
My brothers said how completely in awe
they felt as they witnessed
kindness after kindness
from the members of the ward
who visited the home with dishes
and dishes of food
and words of comfort
and love.
One of my brothers said,
"Every time the doorbell rang,
we just looked at each other
wondering how could they keep coming?
We're not used to being treated like that."

Another brother said,
talking of the Chapel mortuary,
"You'd think there'd been more people for J.--
he'd lived there his whole life--
but maybe some were already dead, ya know?
The chapel was filled with Mormons though. I've never been hugged so much in my life.  And of all these men in suits and ties, you could pick out the Mormon men--there's just something different about 'em--know what I mean?"

Yeah, I do. It's called the Holy Priesthood.

A few minutes later, into our conversation, he said,
"I don't know what you did, Dawn, or who you called, but having the Mormons there, MADE it. They just knew what they were doing, and carried the whole thing off."

"I didn't make any calls. I didn't do anything. I gave mom their number and stepped back." I said.

That's all I had to do.

"People's lives were changed, Dawn. I'm not the same person I was. The Bishop took to me, and we're gonna keep in touch."

I took the opportunity to tell my brother that I am so glad the Mormons in that little town were exactly like the Mormons in the town I live in now. And I asked him, "Can you see why I've been a member all these years and raised my kids in it?  Can you see why now?"

"Yeah.  I love you Dawn."

"Tell Mom I love her."