All Is Calm, All Is Bright

I'm home after a day that started wayyyyyy early
and ended wayyyyy late.


I drove up to Loveland to meet Dean's new caregiver,
and to help set his room up.


I got up to Loveland too early,
so I stopped by Wally World
(and it was, handsdown, the cleanest WW, I've ever been to!--
they should give tours inside, no kidding.  It's in Westminster, CO. fyi)
yeah, so as I was sayin',
I stopped in there to get Dean some stuff.
Actually, I had no idea what I was there for,
but I wanted to bring something with me,
to leave for him there,
as I knew I wouldn't be seeing him today,
but I wanted him to know I'd been there.


I had grabbed a framed family photo off the mantel--
it's the one on my header up there,
and another one of Dean in a tux, 
taken his Senior year.


But the "MOM" in me, 
wasn't done...
there had to be something I could bring my boy
to his new place...
so this is what I found:
* a yellow composition book--because Deano loves to write and scribble.
It calms him down.
* a Santa Claus Yo-Yo (b/c he loves Santa!)
* a Santa Claus tic tac toe game (have u seen his pic on the sideboard? he's Santa's helper!)
* a pack of peppermint gum
* a dry erase board
* a Frosty the Snowman dvd (Santa's in there!)
* AXE toiletries (cuz Deano's a manly man)
* spinning toothbrush and paste 


And I think that's it. Just random stuff.


When I got to his new house,
the agency had just moved his belongings inside,
and the caregiver invited me in,
and we got to know each other 
while we put Dean's stuff away.


I got to make his bed up for him
and I loved it.
You know when you kinda make a bed
and 
when you really make the bed?


I really made his bed.
Like, with all the love in my mother heart,
I made his bed.
lol
And I went thru his clothes and pulled out the weird ones
that aren't even his,
and the worn out ones and too small ones,
and all the junky ones he's shown up to our house in.
And all of his Special Olympics t-shirts that he's grown out of--
I brought them home with me in a big box,
and I've decided to make a nice quilt for him for Christmas
outta those SO shirts.
I think he'll love it.
I hope so.
I hope he doesn't freak out and say,
"Mom! What'd you do to my shirts?!"
That wouldn't be good.
Def not the reaction I'm going for!


Anyway, I was there for two hours
and got to know the new "Mom"
pretty good.
She's an Angel.
She lives in Loveland,
so that makes total sense, hunh?


I told her all about my Dean
and his funny things--
like calling 911 when his closet light burnt out,
and telling David Scott that his new bride, Tisha,
was "HOT".


And I told her how he loves to 
cook
and vacuum
and that "Phantom of the Opera" is his all-time favorite movie
and that he'll tell you he can do ANYTHING--
and will offer to drive the car too,
but that he can't really drive.


And I told her he has a family that loves him
and appreciates her willingness 
to help us take care of him.


And I only boobed-up with tears once,
so I did pretty good.
N' I told her I always boob-up when I talk about Dean.
She is totally cool with that--
she has grown up kids too, 
and they make her boob-up when she talks about them too.


So I cleaned up Dean's room,
laid out his goodies from me,
loaded up the car with the junky stuff
he doesn't need anymore,
hugged the new Mom in his life,
and left there without tears.


Without tears.
Because I felt the prayers of my many friends
lifting my spirits up beyond guilt and grief,
and I felt right today.
Like Kristina P. said in her comments,
I did the right thing.
Thank you Kristina aka Snuggie Woman...
you said the right thing too.


So that's that.
We'll keep in touch of course,
with Dean and his new caregiver,
and we'll see him in a few weeks.


At first,
I was fretting about this move being so close
to Christmas,
but as I drove home listening to 
Christmas music,
I heard Hillary Weeks sing Silent Night,
and when she sang
"All is calm, All is Bright",
that's how I felt right then.
All IS calm
and 
All IS bright.