I Wanted to be "Little Debbie" --and other assorted wild fantasies of my youth

Okay,
so where have I been lately?
Right?
Right.

We STILL have yet to commit to a Family Motto for 2013--
I had pretty much settled on
"We Seek After Bacon"
and thought I'd be clever n' just make
BACON an acronym for something ethereal and lovely like
B=Being Kind
A= Academic Exellence
C= Charity towards others
O=Organize Ourselves
N= Nourishing our Testimonies.

Yeah. That was shot down.
Too cheesy, they say.
{shaking my head}
Do these people not understand
that their Mother is the 
Queen of All Things Cheesy?

So. No Motto. Nothing carved in wood yet.

Okay, so back to my title.
Little Debbie.
I'm a girl of the South.
Cut offs, barefeet, midriffs or bathing suit tops
was the uniform of summer.
The only closed toe shoes I ever owned
were the ones I got at Easter--
white patent leather that I used either toothpaste or Comet
to clean the scuff marks off.
I know what fried okra is,
eaten a belly full o' pork rinds n' frog's feet,
picked cucumbers and bell peppers,
stood atop an old Chevy to pick brown bags full of tangerines,
and knew that day that involved a fresh Moonpie with a YooHoo!
 was a good day indeed.
I am a Southerner.
N' I just loved

Little Debbie.
Yeah.
I used to save the boxes the treats came in--
I don't know why...I thought she looked like me
only in a bonnet.
We could be friends.
I actually mail-ordered a Little Debbie Barbie
when I was old enough to pay for it--

as the mother of 5 chi'ren.
No kidding. Little Debbie rocks.

Also,
I saved Aunt Jemima syrup bottles--
the glass ones that came with the cloth aprons on them.
Seriously loved that buttery syrup.
Are you shaking your head now?
I know. It's nuts. But it's true.

Wendy's.
I wanted to know Wendy of Wendy's.
I've seen her now as an adult,
but I really wanted to see her as a kid--
her "Little Debbie" knock-off garb
combined with her Pippi-Longstocking-styled red pigtails.
I mean, yeah, was I the only one who noticed
Wendy was tryin' to look like Little Debbie??
Lotta nerve if you ask me. Lot. Of. Nerve.
Definitely someone I wanted to know
when I was still as ridiculous as I am now,
but not as cheesy.


The fantasies of my youth were not limited to food icons.

(notice my lovely bangs?)

When I was in second grade,
I'd stand in front of my dresser mirror
n' squint my eyes tryin' to imagine what I'd
look like all grown up 
in the sixth grade.
I didn't know about middle schools and high schools then.
I thought once I got to sixth grade
I'd be like, 21 years old.
I really wanted to look like Barbara Eden

of "I Dream of Jeannie"--
or "Twiggy" with her long eyelashes and short hair.
I figured I had a better chance of coming out like Twiggy
than Jeannie,
because my momma could not stand to let my hair grow
even to my shoulders
before she'd get out her sewing scissors and take a whack at my hair.
She was forever-and-ever-amen
trying to give me a "Page Boy" cut.

(notice my "page boy?)

I typically looked like I had used box cutters on my own hair.
More like Twiggy with her "pixie cut"--
one that my mother ALSO tried out on me.
The other thing I had in common with the lovely Brit
was that I was a bean pole.
My momma used to say,
"Stick out your tongue so we can see you."
So of course I had to have a Twiggy lunchbox--
hoping my classmates would also notice the strong resemblance
between me and my fantasical idol.
To my recollection,
noone ever did,
probably because I looked more like
Little Debbie.



But hey, I didn't know my audience.
Clearly they were too young and Batman and Catwoman
were more popular for the crowd I ran with.
Catwoman scared the beans outta me so much,
that I think that was the beginning of my dislike for cats.
Maybe she woulda been better if she'd owned a dress like Little Debbie.
Or ate a moonpie once in awhile.

Where Are The Christians Part Two

As promised, here is the second of five excerpts from the nationally-released book:

Albert Schweitzer once said "One truth stands firm. All that happens in world history rests on something spiritual. If the spiritual is strong, it creates world history. If it is weak, it suffers world history.” Section one of Where are the Christians? takes on the daunting task of providing a concise and compelling history of Christianity to give readers a background of where it all began as a foundation moving forward. To help the reader navigate an otherwise complicated history Shuster divides the 2000 year period into four segments, one for each of the four chapters in section 1.

Chapter 1:  They Were Evangelizers and Builders (up to AD 299)

While some might think Christianity began the day Christ was born, Christianity was long prophesied in the Old Testament. The over two centuries that followed during the Evangelization and Formation Period were defined by seven major categories of events:  persecution of the church, martyrdom of its early leaders, the spreading of the gospel outside of Palestine, the conversion of Paul, the formation of the church, early heresies, and the writing of the New Testament.

Chapter 2:  They were Legitimized and Codified (AD 300-999)

The Legitimacy and Codification Period from AD 300 to 999 was a time for Christianity to continue its global proliferation, while codifying its doctrines and legitimizing its place in religion and politics. This period of Christianity was defined by seven categories of events:  the continuation of persecution and evangelization, increased heresies, doctrinal codification, hierarchy and politics, validation, and the seeds of corruption.

Chapter 3:  They were Corrupted and Divided (1000-1499)

As the Christian Church neared the millennial landmark it began to be faced with significant issues of leadership that would rupture its unity. Although Christianity was still spreading throughout the world, the organization of the Church would be challenged by its integration with the political structure and an increasingly corrupt leadership.  The Corruption and Division period (1000-1499) is marked by four categories of events including doctrinal evolution, church and state integration, corruption and division.

Chapter 4:  They were Reformed and Scattered (1500 to the Present)

The final segment of Christian history covers the year1500 to the present and is called the Reform and Denominational Proliferation Period. During this period individuals came forward to challenge the established Christian Church to reform itself from corruption. This period is marked by five major activities including the carryover of corruption, the emergence of refiners, reformers and restorers, Christian movements and influencers, the propagation of published scripture and the proliferation of denominations.

Modern-day Christians are influenced by the past and are products of their own history. It is a history that produced the best and worst of humanity over a 2,000 year period. Our faith walk today is affected by and reflects these four periods of Christian history. Having a better understanding of where we came from as a Christian people we are now ready for the next leg of our journey to answers the question:  “What is a Christian?”  

Go to www.findyourchristianity.com to watch the book trailer, find out what type of Christian you are, and to order the book.

Growing a New Talent for 2013

Trying  new things makes me happy.

Just the attitude of approaching something I've never done
with an open mind and a willingness to try it
has served me well most of my live long days.

It is in this spirit that I decided to give "painting" a try.
I've never taken painting classes--
unless you count a tole painting class I took in 1986--
and I haveta say, boy can I paint white ducks!
I can, I can.

I love art.
I have often said my ideal vacation would be to spend at least two whole weeks
locked inside the British Museum by myself or with someone equally enthralled
with art in all it's myriad forms,
and do nothing but look at the beautiful works and breathe it all in.

Watercolors especially intrigue me.
I don't know why...haven't set about to ask myself why...
but the way water and color mix and looks so effortless
is soothing to me.

Anyway,
I tested the waters this month
and bought a few little brushes and paints
and small canvasses to give my interest 
a chance to express...
I painted something I love.
Aspens.
In the Fall.
No photos to look at, 
just let my hands follow the patterns I know
so well in the natural beauty of aspens
and this is what came out:

I know it's not brilliant.

But it's a start.

I want to continue to make the most of this New Year

by learning new things...

what are YOU thinking of trying in 2013?

Where Are The Christians?

Sometimes, people come into my life

through the backdoor, so-to-speak.

Meaning, I don't see them coming

or expect the impact that they will make

once I get to know them.

It is in the getting to know them

that I come to wonder how it is

that I am so fortunate and privileged

to have crossed paths with them,

as they exceed my expectations.

Eric Shuster is my backdoor friend.

I first met him through an opportunity wherein

I was assigned to find a Guest Speaker at a special event

and his name was recommended to me.

That was three years ago.

Since that time, I have had the great pleasure 

of coming to know and love him and his beautiful wife, Marilyn

and their family.

As the best friendships are created,

we have been as blessed by this union as they have.

Our daughter Diana was their nanny before her mission,

as they adopted a set of twins and their older brother.

In the process, 

they became her "second parents" and I cannot say 

how much we truly appreciate their great capacity to love

and the profound influence they've had,

and continue to have

upon our family.

*Marilyn and Eric with our Nana on her first trip to the temple.

Eric and Marilyn are lovely, intelligent truth seekers and sharers--

as he shared in his first book, 

"Catholic Roots, Mormon Harvest"

and then 

The Biblical Roots of Mormonism.

Eric's latest offering is here and I am so stinkin' excited to share it here 

with my family and friends!

Here is the thought-provoking introduction to his marvelous work:

"Ponder if you will the state of our world; and in particular the condition of America. Although one can easily argue the United States is still the greatest nation in the world and a country so many desire to come to—even risk their lives to enter into—there is no denying America’s social, moral and spiritual fabric continues to deteriorate at an accelerated pace. For many this is an alarming and discouraging trend.
Now consider the fact that 76% of Americans claim to be Christian, making the United States one of the highest per-capita Christian nations in the world. A nation full of Christians in a deteriorating society? If this indeed be the case then WHERE ARE THE CHRISTIANS? To solve this conundrum author Eric Shuster gives us a book that bears this question as its title with the promise of answers and unique journey for readers.
Where are the Christians? uses the classic format of who, what, where and how to explore Christianity and the dynamics that unite and divide the religion into the unrealized potential it suffers from today (thus the subtitle of the book—the Unrealized Potential of a Divided Religion). The book enlightens readers as to who the Christians are from a historical perspective; what a Christian is from a spiritual perspective; where the Christians are from a behavioral perspective; and how Christianity can be strengthened and more united from a societal perspective. Where are the Christians? examines hundreds of Biblical and scholarly sources, analyzing data from a multitude of studies leading to unique perspectives and solutions to the challenges facing Christianity in the modern era.
Where are the Christians? contains 17 chapters arranged into four sections:
* SECTION 1: WHO ARE THE CHRISTIANS?—a history: 4 chapters providing a concise history of Christianity spread across four distinct periods: Evangelization and Formation, Legitimacy and Codification, Corruption and Division, and Reform and Denominational Proliferation.
* SECTION 2: WHAT IS A CHRISTIAN?—a definition: 4 chapters examining the definition of a Christian from the perspectives of the world, the Bible, landmark religious studies, and what Shuster refers to as Modern Day Pharisees.
* SECTION 3: WHERE ARE THE CHRISTIANS?—a categorization: 5 chapters profiling the five types of modern Christians including a unique and enlightening exercise to help readers understand what type of Christian they are among the five.
* SECTION 4 – HOW IS CHRISTIANITY TO UNITE?—a vision: 4 chapters describing the ways Christians in America can unite into a force for good by focusing on individuals, families, churches and communities.
For the next 4 weeks author Eric Shuster will take us on a tour through each of the four sections of Where are the Christians? providing a glimpse of what the book is all about—the questions it will answer in each chapter, the insights it will provide, and the vision it lays out in bringing together a deeply divided religion into realizing its true potential for America. This is one tour you won’t want to miss!
Go to www.findyourchristianity.com to watch the book trailer, find out what type of Christian you are, and to order the book."

I am honored to have been asked to participate in the release of his new book and enthusiastically encourage
the reading and sharing of it!  Thanks, Eric!

Why, Hello There, New Year!

Seriously?
It's the second week of January
Two Thousand Thirteen?

I feel like I've been in tumbled about in a dryer
these past couple of weeks.

Christmas was wonderful.
All kinds of crazy noise,
busy days
and late nights
hanging out with all of the people who call me
"Momza".

Highlights:
Christmas morning was a blur of smiles and wrapping paper.
Christmas dinner was both turkey and ham and all the fixin'
and intermittent naps by the whole heehaw gang.
Tisha took pictures but I can't find them on this new pc.

That's right.
David Scott came to town and built us a new pc.
I lub it much much.
The old one was being run by degenerate hamsters on wheels
and was about to die at any given "click"...
so all those years when I pitched fits over yet
"another broken computer!#$Q%!"
because of David Scott's determination to find out what makes 'em tick,
finally paid off!
When I reminded him of those days,
he said,
"Hey, I only broke two."

One of the best parts of the holiday was getting to SKYPE
with our missionary, Diana, from New York.
She first visited with everyone in the family,
and then it was my turn.
Her voice cracked when she saw me
and I showed remarkable strength--
inside of my heart
fireworks were exploding
but on the outside,
I smiled and said,
"Ohhhh...there's our girl!"
She and I visited for about 15 minutes
and she had to go.
But then later that night,
she called home and visited with each of us a bit longer.
It was great feeling to hang up and know she is happy doing what she's doing.


New Years' came in like a lamb.
A sleeping lamb.
David Scott & Tisha went home to Meridian, Idaho
and Brad left for Houston the weekend after Christmas.
So by NYE,
we were all tuckered out.
Though we were invited to come and play with friends,
I am pretty sure my bum was tucked into bed by 9:30pm.

Plus, it was really cold here in Colorado for almost all of the holidays--
highs in the teens and lows in the minuses.
Brrr-frickin'-cold!

Dani and her boys stayed here until just this past Wednesday.

Let me just say this:
there's a reason why old women don't have and shouldn't have
children after a certain age.

And just to keep us on our toes,
we had a major water leak that ran
from the laundry room on the main floor
to a bedroom in the basement,
which filled the ceiling with water and the walls in between.

That was an exciting discovery.
Kent was already at work,
so I pretty much turned to friends to walk me through the day
which they totally did!
Thank you, Friends!
So right now,
my washer and dryer are sitting in the family room.
The mainfloor bathroom has been dried out professionally,
the floors have been ripped up,
the drywall is gone,
and the toilet is sitting in the garage.

The ceiling in the basement has been cut open
and professionally dried too.

The good news is really good news:
we'll get it all put back together
for just the cost of our deductible!
I get to pick out new flooring and paint!
I have been wanting to paint both of those rooms,
and now all I have to do is pick the paint and someone else will do it for me!

I think that's pretty cool.

But wait! There's MORE!
More? You say?
Yes, More!
We've been to the laundromat
and Daisie felt like it was a fantastic Field Trip!
She loves the place!
I know. I have been derelict in my mothering duties,
as my 5th child has never been to a laundromat.
Good thing this happened tho,
as she is getting ready to leave for college this year.
I could change the name of my blog to
"The Derelict Mother" over this...
but that sounds like alot of work
and I'm already tired.

Also on the plate today:
Mr Wonderful is having knee replacement therapy today.

It's been a long time coming--
and while I would love to say he's worn his knees out in prayer--
Bahaha!
--the truth is he wore them out by the thousands of miles
he's hiked and skied over the years.

SO. That's 2013 so far.
Well, the highlights anyway.
There's more.
Of course there's more.
Always.
Like one of my more fine mothering-housekeeping moments yesterday
when I used a pair of socks to dust my dresser
just before I put them on my feet.
What?
I shook them out first.
Two birds with one stone.

And we have chosen our 2013 Family Motto
which I will reveal in the next post.

2013 has started off with a Bang!
And I say
BRING IT!