The Loving Heavenly Principle of Repentance & an MRI

 

Recently, I had to get an MRI my brain.  As I was laying on the platform table, with the head gear on to hold the position of my head still for imaging, I was slowly moved into the MRI chamber.  The tech said it would be about 25 minutes of stillness.  Once in the confined space, I thought I’d do better if I focused on a topic to comfort my mind and body during the procedure.  I decided to focus on Jesus Christ: what I know about His life, His nature and His relationship with me.  I quickly went through the scriptures that witness of his birth, mission, atonement and crucifixion and resurrection.  Then I recalled the witness of Joseph Smith in the Sacred Grove and the Restoration of the Church.  And then, thought of specific instances when I’ve witnessed His presence in my life.   Which then led me to think—How has any of this blessed my Life??

I thought of my family asking the same thing—how has the gospel blessed us in meaningful ways?  I have seven children—each of them are strong-minded, independent human beings with a variety of personalities, skills, and challenges.  As different levels of maturity existed, there were times of discord and contention, hurt feelings and misunderstandings.  When my children were very little, we talked about the principle of repentance in family relationships.  Asking for and accepting forgiveness.  It’s not enough to say “I’m sorry” –there must be a change in behavior that the offender accepts responsibility for, so that the apology is meaningful and has credibility.  An example comes to mind when my youngest two were in grade school—Joseph, the oldest, at around 6 years old, had repeatedly offended his younger sister—and he had offered his apologies over and over again, but the behavior hadn’t changed until one day, he said, “I’m sorry.” To which 5 year old Arianna responded, “I don’t ass-ept it.”  Joseph was shocked by her response; “You have to accept it! You have to! Mom, tell her!”  Ari then scolded him for not changing his behavior: “You’re just saying it, but you don’t mean it. SO, I don’t ass-ept it.”    A sincere apology is where true repentance begins.

Many years ago, I made some mistakes that I needed to repent for—I worked with my Bishop and leaned into the scriptures and discovered what the prophets describe as “godly sorrow”.  Godly Sorrow is a gift of the Spirit wherein I felt great distress over the pain I personally caused the Savior to atone. It is a truly sorrowful grief.  To feel my repentance was accepted by the Lord elevated my relationship with Him, as I came to understand more fully the nature of Jesus Christ and Heavenly Father.  I tasted the sweetness of forgiveness, of wholeness and peace and the full company of the Holy Ghost.   I was a changed person. I learned that as I needed mercy, I also needed to extend mercy to others.

So, I brought this loving heavenly principle into my parenting for the sake of strengthening family relationships. It has blessed us just as I hoped it would.  My children are especially tightly knit.  That is not to say that they all agree on everything—but they do respect one another and are careful to make amends when feelings are hurt.  My daughter in law, Tisha, who also comes from a large family noted that when our family gets together, we just talk and enjoy one another, whereas in her family there must be a distraction like an activity that they all deem worthy of their time and effort. Otherwise, there is contention—often left over from childhood. In contrast, our kids just want time together to laugh and talk about life.  They’ve learned how to ask for forgiveness and how to extend forgiveness equally.  “I don’t ass-ept it” is still a phrase we refer to as a teaching tool in our family relationships. Actions speak louder than words any day.

When we apply gospel principles in our family relationships, we have been strengthened and blessed.  My grown adult children are each other’s best friends—they speak daily, they care for one another in meaningful ways, they are open in their expressions of gratitude for one another and turn to each other when life is hard.  They love their nieces and nephews, and this is probably just one reward for practicing repentance and forgiveness in our family.  

As I lay there in the MRI machine, I couldn’t hold back the tears of gratitude for the loving heavenly principle of Repentance.  It is a foundation of our family and we wouldn’t be who we are without it.  Focusing on Jesus Christ in all things and in all places—literally can bless us all.