Our Family Council

Sometimes
Sometimes
This Momza has to grab the reins
to harness in her family.
Things start going amuck around here

and I start looking for the EXIT signs.

This week has been building up
to one of those
Sometimes...
the kids in my house
showed signs of alien-abduction:
forgetting all good manners,
arguing like OJ Simpson's lawyers ("You must aquit if the glove don't fit!)
and in all other ways
behaving as though they've been raised by wolves.
In Wyoming,
because we all know how they are.

Mornings have been uncivilized...
like prisoners of Azkaban
they begin the day by stating their demands
and clanking their cups on the sideboards,
Whining turns into outright fussing
and fussing mutates into
every manner of rotten-ness...
and there I am in the middle
wracking my brain trying to
say the "magic spell"
that will turn these would-be criminals
into law abiding citizens.

We've had moments of peace--
usually when their mouths are full
or their noggins are resting on their wee pillows
but lately,
I tell you what,
there's been awhole lotta fussin' goin on.
Afterschool has become less
"I'm so glad to see my children,
the offspring of my soul--
to
"Shoot! It's 4pm--they'll be here any minute!
Where can I hide until the madness is over?"

So last night,
I. had. had. it.
"FAMILY COUNCIL AFTER DINNER!"
I announced to the whole house,

loud enough for every unruly ear to hear.

Oh that got everyone's attention...
the "Ugh-Mom's-gonna-lecture-us" moan began.
And guess what?
I didn't care.
I was determined.
In the name of Survival
and Self-preservation
I was thinking
time to take control of this wayward Circus!

So they dragged their guilty bums to the sofa
and laid about like they have no backbones--
just skin-covered forms of children...
I normally pull out a diningroom chair
and sit in the middle of the room,
but this time
I stood up
in front of them
like a force to be reckoned with!

I pulled out my cheatsheet--
the notes I had made earlier,
that had the outline I wanted to follow--
and said
"Is everyone having a good time? Do you like coming home
to a bunch of grouchy people? ...something's off-track around here, and
we need to take a look at what's going on around here.
Does anyone know what respect means?"
Ari raises her hand--she ALWAYS raises her hand--because she is 8. Nuff said.
"Respect is when you are kind to others. It's an IB Attitude. And our house needs to be an IB house not a regliar house! An' I go to an IB school and it's great! An' if I went to a regliar school, I would not like it. But I sit next to Iliana an' she doesn't act like an IB kid, an' Mrs. Z says Iliana has to sit by her at the front until she learns her IB attitudes. SO WE need to be an IB Family!!" (hands waving wildly, body contortions all over the loveseat, where she ends up with her legs wrapped around her neck)

That's right, Ari. We show respect for others when we are kind and when we care about them. We listen to them. We may not agree with them, but we don't shout and we don't hit, but we listen. And we are careful about their feelings, right?

Okay, let's talk about HABITS...Joseph, what's a habit?
He grimmaces.  He's boycotting in silence the meeting as a whole.  He's 10.
Ari raises her hand again.
Okay, Ari, what is a habit?

"Something you do all the time."

That's right, it can be something you do at school too...what's some habits, or things you do every day at school?

"We have bell work--we get 10 seconds to hang our coat, and like 10 seconds to pick our lunch, and we haveta take a seat and do spelling words."

Does anyone ever say they don't wanna do it?
She nods her head, "Oh yeah. Marcus. Every. Day!"
And what happens if he doesn't do it.
"He's in TRRRRRoubbble!"
Does he end up doing it?
Raising her eyebrows, "Oh YEAH."
And who made up the bell work?  Who taught your class how to do that stuff?"

"Mrs. Z. She's so AWESOME! I LOVE HER!"

OK, thanks Bee.  Next I wanna talk about another word
Responsibility.
Dara, what's that mean?
The 14 year old favors a zombie...and mumbles out

"Stuff you have to do."

OKay, and let's think about that for a minute.
Can anyone tell me
What is Dad's number one Responsibility?
Silence.
Dad, what's your first responsibility?

"To take care of my family."

That's right.
We all have responsibilites--
Ari interrupts, "WE HAVETA DO OUR PART!"
she is half-laying on the sofa, upside down.

So we talked about it a bit longer
until I got a verbal commitment
from the whole heehaw gang
that they would try harder.

Hugs all around and they were off like rockets!

And I felt cleansed.
I let go of the reins and sighed relief.

The course correction had been made,
we may just have this Circus
on the right track again.