Did you know that families who sit down
for at least one meal a day together
are happier?
It's true.
Columbia University did a huge study
and this is what they found:
In a home where families ate dinner together
at least 5 times a week:
Teens had better grades.
42% were less likely to drink alcohol
59% were less likely to smoke
66% were less likely to try marijuana
Those are impressive statistics, right?
We are a family that sits down together
for evening meals.
It does make a difference in our relationships
with one another.
Recently, Mr W took a new position at work.
He has missed dinner 4 of 7 nights a week
for the past two weeks.
And I noticed a difference--
I'm crankier,
the kids are crankier,
Mr W is, well, crankier.
The bottom line is
we miss it.
Tha'ts what made me think about this topic
"family meal time"--
I've been wondering what's been going on
with me and my yahoos,
thought it might be the missing meals
so I looked into it...
and there's something to this,
I am convinced.
Having dinner together provides
a time to teach values,
to keep in touch
with each other's schedules,
interests,
or
trouble-shooting problems
together so we can teach the kids
how to have discussions, form opinions,
and to work together as a group
rather than an individual.
It's a time to build and re-build.
Harvard University also did a study
on Dinner Time
and one thing they found was that
33% Girls are less likely to develop
unhealthy eating habits from skipping meals
to anorexia or abusing diet pills.
Harvard also found that teens look forward
to that meal time at the end of the day.
Did you see that?
They look forward to it.
I asked my kids if this was true,
and the answer was "yes"--
as long as meal time wasn't
a "Chew-out" time.
So we gotta keep it positive.
The blame for scattered family meals
is laid on TIME.
There's activities afterschool/work planned,
but even then,
you can plan to have meals together
whether it's ordered-in
(almost every restaurant has a take-out menu)
or just pushed back to 7pm
or just for 20 minutes--
it's important to eat together.
So whether Mr. W is here or not,
I have to make sure
dinner time is not
"hit-or-miss" time.
And yes, it's not the same
without our Dad at the head of the table,
but until his schedule changes,
it is what it is
and the kids and I need dinner time
to look forward to
every night.
I have to make sure
dinner time is not
"hit-or-miss" time.
And yes, it's not the same
without our Dad at the head of the table,
but until his schedule changes,
it is what it is
and the kids and I need dinner time
to look forward to
every night.
~~~
What should you talk about?
We ask two questions of everyone at the table
every night--
even our dinner guests get to answer them:
1) What was the best part of your day?
2) What did you do for someone else today?
Other Questions Could be:
Ask everyone to share their favorite part or biggest challenge of the day.
Plan and then let the kids pick tasks for the next day's menu, preparation, and cleanup.
Exchange memories about your favorite family pastimes.
Discuss an activity the family can do together and then put it on the calendar.
Talk with your children about a book they are reading or a movie they have seen. It might turn into a family book club or a regular movie and popcorn night!
Ask the kids about their classes, homework, teachers, and upcoming assignments. Find out if they would like your help or want to brainstorm on an assignment.
So, let the shout go out:
DINNER TIME!!
We've been feeling a lack of "dinner time" at our house too. One night a week, I'm at church, and my son is playing basketball, which takes him and my husband to practice two nights at week. It's been tough. We just had a discussion last night about needing to restructure so we can fit family dinner back in more often than not. Our kids are still little, and we are still in the "forming habits" stage of their lives. It is SO very important.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the reminder and the encouragement!
So true. That dinner hour is invaluable for families. And it seems to be slowly slipping away in our over-scheduled culture.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the reminder.
=)
I sit my kids to the table for every meal ... but we don't get dad in there much at all. I have told him it would make all the difference to me to have him there (his schedule IS a little flexible) ... but he doesn't think its so big a deal.
ReplyDeleteI love your blog and your wisdom. You Rock!
Great post. I think we all need to be reminded now and again that family meals are an excellent time to reconnect and regoup as a family. Because we are empty nesters we have gotten in the habit of fixing our plates and watching tv. I think we need to get back to sitting at the table and discussing our days again.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the reminder, and the findings of the studies speak for themselves.
We are good about dinner together- but my kids are so little that there isn't much other option!
ReplyDeleteWe talk about something hood, something you were proud of, something that was hard. What I love is that my almost 5 year old has started asking me the same questions back- wanting to know about what we do at work.
Our dining room table is currently out of commission. My kids eat at a small kid size table in the living room and Jeff and I usually eat on the couch- still together but not at the same table. Last night, I sat on the floor and ate at the kids' table and the kids ate better and we had a more pleasant evening!
I especially love dinner time whem all my girls are home. They keep me laughing all through the meal. That has to burn calories, right? When life gets busy and we aren't eating together it is my husband who gets cranky. He just needs the routine and structure. But I think it is essential for the kids as well. Good research!!
ReplyDelete