Weekend Round-Up

In no particular order:

Saturday I worked.
Saturday was also the Boofus' birthday.
So Mr. W took him all over town for the day
shopping
and out to lunch at Five Guys.

While I worked.

Dani and the Ninja Baby came down
with her sister-in-law, J. --from Boise, to visit us
and Dani brought her homemade
"Chocolate Truffle Cake"--
and yes, it was as good as it sounds!
If I get her recipe, I'll share it.
Dani decorated the cake as Joseph helped.
It had an army theme...
army guys, marshmallow boulders, green coconut grass,
red syrup for the battle scene,
and we used sparklers instead of candles.
Boofus loved it.

Mr. W made Boofus' favorite meal:
Chicken Fettucine Alfredo Florentine
and garlic bread.
Delicioso!

Boofus declined a "friend party" this year,
in his words,
and I am quoting here:
"Just give me the money."
Have I said today how much I love this yahoo?
*****

Sunday was Church.
We went and sat in the 2nd row like always,
but it was one of those days where my mind
was elsewhere.
Trying to rein myself IN,
I thought to take notes from the speakers...
but one kept saying "Um"
and I looked down to see I had made a
tick line every time "um" was said,
and I was up to 45 times,
when it dawned on me that that was rude.
I have no idea what the speaker was talking about,
other than the topic.
It started when the speaker said something along the lines
of
"I wish I wasn't here today...."
ANYTIME
and I Mean,
ANYTIME
a speaker starts off with their confession that
they'd rather be anywhere but in front of the congregation--
I tune out.
I can't help it,
every time I've ever been in a meeting where
the speaker announced their displeasure of being asked to talk,
their message is forced. boring. mundane.
There's no passion, no emoting,
and usually void of the Spirit
so that the whole twenty or thirty minutes
leaves me feeling like I wasted my time.
I imagine tossing a shoe at their noggins,
or a hymnal--
"Go Big or Go Home!"--I'd like to yell.
But
that wouldn't be nice.
Or anything resembling nice.
So I sit still, with my eyes closed,
trying to hear something, anything that means something
and at the same time,
fight the urge to slide the kids down the pew
lay down, put my feet up,
wrap my coat around my head
and catch some Zzzzz's.

This probably never happens to anyone else
and so I won't be surprised to hear an
"aghast" at my confession,
but ya know?
They don't have to twirl fire-blazing batons
and whistle Dixie
to do well,
but they should come to share what they've learned
while preparing for their moment in front of us--
and for crying out loud,
if they've nothing to say,
make it brief and sit down.

Okay, now I'm rambling.
*****

Tomorrow's my birthday.
I'm almost 50.
I can't wait until I'm 50.
I wish I was 50 tomorrow.
I used to think 50 was so old.
I'm knocking on 50's Door,
and I don't feel like I thought I would,
ya know?
Aside from the whiney rambling, right?
*******

I lost five pounds since I started working.
Through no effort of my own.
Seven pounds if I stand just right on the scale.
So how cool is that??
Way.
I love losing weight effortlessly
like the commericals for Slimfast and Jenny Craig
and all those others say on TV.
There's a couple of diets going around these parts--
the horse-urine diet,
and the HCG diet.
I looked into them...
just enough to know I'm not a good candidate.
I like food too much.
And 500 calories a day is like 3 bowls of cereal
with skim milk and no sugar.
Doesn't sound fun to me at all.
Nope, that's a sure recipe for failure.
And, seeing as how I'm nearly 50,
I ain't got time for more failures in my life.
Ya know?
Time to stick with what I know.
My bucket list includes eating really good food
come the Holidays,
spending time around the table with family and friends,
and a Size 5 just ain't on that list.
I was a Size 5 once.
When I was 15 years old.
I didn't appreciate how small I was.
I still thought my tummy was too fat
and I had no bosom to speak of.
So it wasn't all that and a bag o'chips,
ya know?
Meh.
*********
My BFFFFFFFFF, Nan,
is taking me out today for my birthday.
She just called to tell me to be ready in an hour
and that I might wanna shave my legs.
I'm hoping Kevin Costner's on the agenda today.
I'd shave my legs for him every day of my life.
lol
Well, knowing me, as well as I know me,
prolly not for the rest of my life.
But, hey, I know whatever Nan has lined up for me today
is gonna be Sawwweeeeeet.
Everyone should have a friend like Nan.
I love her.
I asked if she's taking me to get a psychiatric evaulation
but she says "no"--
but wouldn't you say "no" if you were taking a crazy person
for a psychiatric evaluation??
Yeah. See what I mean?

If I'm not blogging again by Thursday,
you'll know I've been committed.
Which, for me sounds like a great time to catch up
on some sleep, some TV, and People magazine.


Okay, I'm done.
If you've made it this far,
well, you've done your good turn today,
so pat yourself on the back!
And go eat some chocolate.