And That Was Thanksgiving 2010...

It's over.
The whole shebang...
the weeks of planning,
the hours of shopping,
and cooking...
Over.

Thanksgiving needs to be like Target
during the holidays
and have Extended Hours,
right?

We had a humongous 23 pound bird
and she was delicious!
We had all the fixin's to go with,
and pie afterwards!
I passed "FULL" to "Pain-Full"
before I got to dessert.

Thanksgiving Day was super cold,
I think the High temp got up to freezing,
so we didn't even go outside.

The Golden Child wrangled his parents
and put the rest of us under his ninja spell--
is there anything more entertaining than a baby?
I'll be that his picture was taken more than 200 times
over the course of the day.
It would be an understatement to say we are "smitten"--
we are enraptured by this baby's cheeks and bright blue eyes.
He owns us.
***

After dinner,
the Black Friday ads were poured thru,
and a plan of attack was charted:
We needed a new television--
as you may recall, our great behemoth died.
That was the beginning of October.

So we set our sites on two different TV's--
one was at Target
the other at Walmart.
That was the only thing we had on our Black Friday list--
a television set.
Yon Boofus raised his voice and hand volunteering
to go with Dad
in the dark morning hours
to retrieve the newest member of the household.

They got up at 3:30AM
and set out for Target first.
Mr W reports that after seeing a line of people
who'd obviously been camping out
circle the entire building
for hours before they got there,
Plan B (or Plan Walmart)
was enacted and he and his sidekick
darted across town
or over the woods and dale
to our Walmart in Monument.

It was a challenge to even find the 42" Emerson LD HDTV
Waiting Line,
and Mr W was tempted on two different occassions to toss his hat to the ground
and come home empty-handed,
but Mr. Boofus encouraged him to continue on.

Their perseverance paid off
and when they returned at 5:30 AM,
faces beaming brightly as they entered the house
with the bounty they had gone out hunting for
on their shoulders
and all was well!

Then, we went back to bed for a couple more hours.
Mr. W didn't rest long,
then he got to work assembling and putting up the TV--
just in time to watch the days' football games.
And he was happy.

The middle girls--
Nana and Daisie had stayed up past midnight,
to go get their own bounty at Walmart.
They too, did not come home empty-handed
but with a new toaster, crockpot, food processor,
and mixer...
much to Dani's delight.
Well done, Ladies! Well done!

The day started out famously...
but as it wore on,
poor Dean's anxiety got the better of him--
he knew he was returning to his home in Loveland,
and he said repeatedly he didn't want to go
and then lost it...
he struck out at Dani and myself.

The day ended sourly,
as Mr. W and I drove Dean the two hours north to his home.
Dean rode mostly silent all the way there.

He went in the house quietly,
and when I went to give him a hug goodbye,
he walked away.
I asked him if he's upset that I'm leaving him there--
"yeah" he said.
"Are you just ready for me to leave now?"
"Yeah."

His current caregiver visited with us
outside for a few moments before we left.
I think he wanted to unburden his own heart and feelings of "failure" -as he called it,
because he can't take care of Dean's needs.

He is suggesting that Dean be put in a group home--
for the structure and extra hands available.

I don't agree at all.
From everything I've read,
Group Homes are for less-functioning special needs
and there are more opportunities for
abuse and neglect in Group homes.
Since Dean's been in this man's home,
Dean has not been involved in Special Olympics,
or community programs
other than his work programs.
Dean's usually involved in The Loveland SN Orchestra
at Christmas
and the Loveland Ballet Theatre group that hosts a SN's concert/musical
at Christmas.
Dean's just been very bored.
And I think his meds are totally messed up.
So I'll report that this week to his psychologist and team
to see if they can help out.

Anyway,
my heart was heavy all the way home.
If you're inclined to pray,
would you think of my son, Dean this week,
as he moves to another host home?
I'm praying that this one will be a better fit for him,
and his heart will be comforted.
Thank you.
I love my son.

****

We got home in time to watch the
Boise State vs. Nevada game.
We're BSU fans,
having lived in Boise we know that team is
nearly worshipped,
and had great fun cheering them on while we lived there.
So when I went to sleep last night,
Boise was whipping Nevada but good~!
I was in shock this morning to read that BSU lost.
How is this possible?
*****

It's Saturday,
and I have to work.
Boo.
This is where those Extended Hours
would come in handy,
ya know?
I'm just really tired.
But then, I think--
isn't everyone I know
really tired?
So it's not just Me--
knowing that is comforting.
Everyone's just doing what they can, right?
Right.

Time to put away the Fall accessories
and bring out the Christmas stuff!
That's a mood lifter, for sure.
Boofus is really good at putting up the tree.

Happy Weekend.
December's almost here.

My Gratitude is True

There are parts to mothering a handicapped child,
that bring me infinite Joy:
watching Dean play any of his myriad of sports--
his three-pointers in basketball,
his homeruns in softball,
his goals in soccer,
those slam-dunks in volleyball,
and finishing up a solid lap in swimming.

Each time, I feel like I"m witnessing a miracle
from a little boy whom I was told by
"medical professionals"
would never walk or talk.

Dean amazes me.

He is the softspot of my heart,
the tender underbelly of my soul.
I can barely speak of him to others without my heartstrings pulling
and oh brother, the tears erupt faster than I can stop them.
When it comes to my love for this child,
I am completely raw.

Dean hasn't lived with us in five years,
because his needs exceed my abilities.
I hate that.
Can I just say that without sounding pathetic?
I hate it.

I miss him more than I can say.
I am only whole
when he's at home,
sleeping under my roof,
eating at our dinner table.

Since it's Thanksgiving,
we made plans to see Dean.
His State-run program only allows us to see Dean
for 4 consecutive 24-hour periods.
Totally sucks.
Otherwise, there's a financial adjustment for his caregivers,
and that always makes me feel guilty
on both ends--
if we keep him longer,
it takes money out of his caregivers' pockets,
but when I don't see Dean,
I worry that he feels abandoned.

Phone calls do not make the distance easier,
because in every call,
he pleads to come home and see us.
I know he misses us.
There's just no easy way around this.
We used to live in the same city as he does,
but then we moved,
and the county we live in now,
has insufficient funds for quality care for Dean.
So in his best interest,
we've left him up in Loveland.
None of this is easy.

Anyway,
getting to the Gratitude Part--
Dani was going to pick up Dean yesterday
as she is just an hour away from him,
and bring him home to me.
But since Mr. Idaho is the EQP (Elders' Quorum President) in his ward,
he has responsibilities that prevented her from being able to take the one car
they have (they traded in their individual cars last summer and bought just one.)

I was worried anyway,
about Dani going by herself to pick Dean up,
as he is moving again from the caregiver's home he
JUST moved into in September--
because that caregiver says he was unaware that Dean's needs
exceeded his ability as well.
I've been mad about that--
I hate moving Dean and I know it stresses him out,
like any normal person would be,
only alot worse.
So I worried about Dani being able to handle Dean
if he had an outburst and became physical.

I called work and tried to see if I could leave early
for the two hour drive up north to get him
myself.
The answer was No.

Mr. W said he could go get Dean after work--
which would put them home around 7:30-8pm.
That's a long day,
but at the time, seemed like our only option.

Then, Dani called back and said she'd make it work somehow
so that she could get him and keep him overnight at her place
and bring him with her family on Thanksgiving.

Okay, so in the meantime,
I'm trying to work things like time and place
out with Dean's caregiver.
When one of us will get there,
and where we can meet up so we don't have to go
all the way into Loveland.

That was stressing me out
because I want to make it easy on the caregiver,
ya know?
He's already asked that we remove Dean from his home,
I don't wanna inconvenience him if I don't have to.
ugh.

So I went to work,
hope full that Dani could work it out on her end,
and just flat-out sad that I couldn't just do it myself,
as I usually do.
Before I had a job.
I was just too emotional for words,
so what do I do when I'm like that?
I clean.
N' just so you know,
the floors, counters, tabletops, lamp shades,
shelves, and every other stinkin' thing
in All About Home Showroom
is spotless today.

Around two hour after I got to work,
my Nana came by to tell me she was on her way to
Loveland to pick up Dean.
Her work cancelled and she would do it.
I was relieved and grateful,
but worried at the same time,
for all of the same reasons I was worried about Dani going
AND
because we were assured a snow storm was going to hit
our side of the Rockies yesterday
and she still hasn't put on her snow tires yet.

I gave her a big hug,
and proceeded to pray while I was cleaning
all day long yesterday,
for her safety and Dean's emotional state.

All Day.

When I finished sweeping the whole store,
I dusted.
When I finished dusting,
I vacuumed.
When I wrapped the cord around the vacuum,
I dusted again.
Then I swept under every thing I could get to.
And dusted again.
I did that for the six plus hours I was there,
as there were just three customers all day long.

I told Nana to call me once she got there,
and once she got Dean and was on her way back home.
And she did,
but when the clock rolled around to 4pm and she still wasn't home with him
I was worried and called her.

She was at Dani's house with Dean.
She said she took him there because he needed to be cleaned up
before I saw him
as she knew I'd be upset.
So she took him to Dani's house.
Dani is a second Mom to Dean--
she and Mr. Idaho gave Dean a shower,
cut his hair,
cleaned his ears,
shaved his overgrown beard,
trimmed his toenails,
brushed his teeth,
put on deodorant
and clean clothes,
fed him and loved him.
I told Nana to give Dani and Brad a big hug for me.

And then, once that was done,
Nana brought him home to me.

Do you get this??
Am I leaving anything out?

I have an amazing family...
sisters and brothers who love each other
and serve one another
and by doing so fill my heart with unspeakable joy!

Even when I cannot be there for Dean,
the softspot of my heart,
his brothers and sisters ARE.
They served him in the most pure way--
caring for his physical body.

Look, I don't know why his caregiver hasn't done
a better job at taking care of Dean...
to make sure his hair is trim,
his beard is shaven,
his teeth and ears and nails are properly hygienic.
I don't know.
BUT,
we are moving him to a better place next week.
There's a mother in that home.
And for that,
I am grateful too.

I admit,
I wondered yesterday why this is so hard.
And that old puke, Satan was ever present in my ear,
making me feel more crappy about the challenges that are mine
than I already did.
I compared myself to my friends--
whose trials seem so insignificant in this light to me.
I wish I had a friend who had a son like mine.
So I would know at least one Mother in the world
whose grief compares--
apples to apples, ya know?

But here's the thing--
as those ugly thoughts clamored for attention
yesterday
and I cleaned until I couldn't clean anymore--
like a tiger circling it's cage,
I circled the store,
cleaning and straightening,
with tears sneaking out of my eyes at times,
finally
a feeling of peace came over me,
and it was time to go home.

I was at home for just a little while,
busy making dinner,
when Joseph came bounding down the stairs:
"He's Here! Dean's here!! They just pulled up!!"
Daisie and Ari came a-running
and we all gathered at the doorway to welcome Dean home.

His thousand watt smile greeted us,
and my arms encircled my boy with all the strength I had,
I breathed him in and found peace after a long day of unrest.

I hugged Nana,
and when Mr. W came home,
he hugged Nana,
and Ari hugged Nana too...
all of us grateful she was able to fetch our Dean for us.

I was fretting about not being the Mom,

the one who is in charge of Dean--

and here I am,

several hours later,

realizing the day was just as should've been--

Dean's sisters and brother-in-love saw the opportunity

to serve both Dean and Me,

and they seized it with their hearts wide open.

I don't know any other mother

who has my same trials,

but the gratitude I feel right now,

is unequaled too.

If this is what family is all about,
then what more can I ask for?

It's Thanksgiving Morning.
My Gratitude is True.

Unemployment to Employed to Employing

IN order to give this post substance,
here's a little background:

In 2006, our family moved to Idaho
with a new job.
We knew we were supposed to move to Idaho
three years before we got the opportunity,
so when the job offer came,
there was no question that we would GO!

Exactly, one year later
we found ourselves unemployed...
along with thousands of others in the
Treasure Valley.
At first I thought it was going to be a
leisurely summer
having Mr. Wonderful home
and didn't sweat the unemployment.

I figured we'd have a few weeks together
and he'd be re-hired before we knew it.

I was wrong.

Summer flew by,
no job.
School started,
no job.
A son's wedding was planned
for December,
"Surely", I thought,
"We'll have a job by Christmas!"--
no. no we didn't.

I set these mental notes--
"by Valentines. By April fools.
By the time our daughter came home from
her mission, in April. By Summer Break."
No. No. No. No.

I would be lying if I said it wasn't difficult.
That I didn't cry in despair...
that I wondered how this was all gonna work out.

Trials come and go,
this is true.
We all know this,
but if you think about it,
what we really wanna know
about our trials
is this:
How bad is it gonna hurt?
right?

Well our Idaho Experience cost us alot,
but we didn't leave empty-handed.
It required all of our savings--
we're so grateful we had it!
But we came away from Idaho with
two new family members...
a daughter-in-love
and a son-in-love.


After a year of sending off resumes
filling out applications,
working part-time,
we knew something had to change.
It was time to go.
When we made the decision to cut our losses
and come back home to Colorado,
the future was up in the air.

We came back home
with heavy hearts.
We'd been through alot since we'd been gone
for two years.
We hoped we'd never forget what we learned
as a family
and as individuals
from our Idaho Experience,
but also,
that we'd recover from our losses.

It sanctified us and we wanted to keep it that way.

It's been almost two years
since we've been home.
Mr. W got a job 3 days after he came looking for one
in Denver.
He just got a promotion.
And guess what he does now?
One of his responsibilities is to
Interview and Hire
new Employees.

Every week
he comes home with a story
or two
about persons he's hired...

One man showed up for temp work
and another man just showed up
unexpected and unannounced,
with him--
Mr. W let them both work that day.

The second man wasn't qualified to
continue to work the next day
and that made us both sad.

But Mr. W knew that look in the man's eyes...
and did what he could--
and his eyes teared up telling me about it.
I was a bit choked up too.

Yesterday,
two women (sisters) came in for interviews--
both are Russian immigrants.
Mr. W told HR to hire them both.
When the younger sister was offerred the job,
she started crying.

Tears are in my own eyes as I write this.
I know that feeling.
We've been there.

Times are hard.
Good people with good hearts
and true work ethics
are unemployed
and day after day
they wonder what's going to happen to them.


We have to be kind
to look beyond our own noses--
beyond the edge of our own sidewalks
and agendas.
A little kindness goes so far.


There are angels in Boise.
They lifted me up
and buoyed my family
when we need the help.
Our faithful hometeacher,
Brother Robertson,
our Bishops--
Philips and Rodgers,
wonderful Visiting Teacher,
Sister Robertson,
and Relief Society President,
Sister Hardy...
along with our dear new friends
the Sylvesters and Frogleys
and so so many others.

Once we got home,
it was our dear friends
here that shouldered our
burdens and helped us see
that things were going to be okay.

All of these
were truly answers to our prayers.
Truly.


We just bought a new sofa set this week.(remember, the dog ate our loveseat?)
As I was paying for it at the store,
I physically felt awful--
nauseas, anxiety--
the sales gal looked at me and asked if I was okay,
I smiled
and said,
"Well, I just haven't spent this kind of money
in a long time because my husband was out of work
awhile back,
and I'm a little nervous about spending money like this."

She answered, "I know. My husband has been out of work for six months and we just don't spend money on anything we don't have to."

Instantly, I saw her in a different light.

Then, to lighten the mood, I said,
"Oh shoot. I bet you're wishing I'd gone for the leather set now, hunh?"

We both laughed.
 I kept her card. I'm writing a nice letter to her boss,
and to her just to go out of my way to thank her and recognize her help.
 Any little kindness helps, right?

Okay, now I'm just rambling.
I'm too lazy to edit this,
so if you're still here
I hope it made sense.

Be kind.  Bottom line.
Be Kind.

Every Woman Has the Birth She Needs

See these shoes? These Nikes with their bright orange swoosh?  They started walking the halls of Exempla Lutheran Hospital at 8:10AM on Tuesday morning.  They walked from the car to the Labor & Delivery Floor, then they walked up and down the halls of said hospital, rode on the hospital elevator to the top floor and walked down all the flights of stairs to the bottom and did that again and again. These Nike's rock almost as much as their owner.


 
See this girl, this is my girl. And Mr. Idaho's girl. I have first dibs though. Neener neener.   Meet the owner of the Nike's with the bright orange swoosh.  This is before the nurse ruptured her membranes to bring on labor for a baby that was 10 days overdue.
She even did her hair and makeup--because, as she put it, "I knew Mom would be taking pictures for her blog."  I haveta admit, I did the same thing, only I forgot to be in any pictures. I looked fabli-ous, though, really. 
When the Admitting Nurse asked Dani, on a pain scale of 1-10, when would you like to receive pain medication, Dani replied, "ten".

  
After her membranes had been ruptured for 2 hours, the Midwife said they would have to start talking about pitocin. Dani said "No thanks. I just need more time."  So she walked, and she squatted, and she sat on the birth ball, and she walked some more. And then she took a warm bath that helped kick her into labor.

She is 7 cm dilated and still on her feet.  But things were getting more intense, so we put her back into the jacuzzi...where she stayed until she was 9 cm dilated. Then she had to get out. And THAT was miserable.  She was comfortable, and coping wonderfully, but this hospital doesn't do water births, so she had to get out. We got her onto the bed, where she kneeled on the edge to help the baby come down easier than on her back. Which, btw, she hated being on her back.  By midnight, she was exhausted.  We all were.

Now this is where my Mother heart is raw and tender. My prayers were constantly for her to have strength to finish this on her own terms. At one point, she said, "I can't do this. I can't do this."  The baby was taking a long time coming down, even after she was fully dilated. Dani continued her breathing rhythm, with Mr. Idaho applying counter-pressure on her hips, and Diana and me at her side, breathing with her, all of us in chorus, praising her efforts and strength.
"You can do this! you ARE doing this! you're amazing Dani!

We're right here. We're so proud of you. Almost done, almost done."

Rubbing her shoulders and arms, applying cool compresses on her neck, and warm compresses on her perineum for her comfort.

All of our actions/thoughts were for her comfort and support.

When she had been pushing about 30-45 minutes, she was in an upright position, leaning back on the bed--she was so tired, and again said,

"I can't do this."

Diana and I were at her feet, rubbing her legs constantly, and I said, "Dani, listen to me, I want you to say: "I CAN DO THIS. Now, say it with me, I can do this. I can do this"--she joined me, and that became her mantra thru several more waves of contractions as she brought the baby down.  Even with tears, she continued,"I can do this, I can do this..." and we all in chorus echoed her words back to her, "You can do this, You can do this!"
Mr. Idaho's eyes were teary, as he became one with his wife. He praised her, loved on her, held her, and was at her side and in her ear whispering every good and kind thing in his heart. When she cried, he cried. Her anguish was his. Her relief was his relief.  She leaned on him and he welcomed every bit of it. The bond that was forged in those hours will carry them thru many other trials, I do believe. He continually expressed his love for her and reassured her that she was 'doing great' and in the process of giving her strength, I do believe he increased his own.
I was in awe of my daughter, clearly, this was a large baby, and we knew that going into labor---we suspected between 8-9 pounds.  Which is alot for Dani's 5'5" frame. We gave her honey stix for energy and the midwife gave her oxygen for renewed energy--which totally helped!

When the baby's head finally crowned, Diana, who had been a quiet supporter, spoke up, "Dani, I can see the baby's head-- you're almost done!"

Dani said, "They've been saying that for hours!"

Diana, knowing her sister so well, said, "They lied. I'm not lying. You're almost done!"

And with just a few more strong, focused pushes,

 

Garrett Theodore Bradley came into this world.

Ten Pounds, 8 ounces.

Twenty-one and a quarter inches long!

 See this girl. She's not a girl anymore. She is an Amazing, Strong Mother.

There's a Midwife Mantra that says, "Every woman has the birth she needs."
I love witnessing women give birth--it is such an empowering experience...
 it was humbling and emotional and I am left in complete awe of my daughter's strength and determination.   Dani needed to have this baby on her own terms, and she did indeed have the birth she needed.  I have never been to a birth where the baby weighed over 10 and half pounds!  I don't even know anyone who has...Dani earns the Prize. A gold star. She wins!
What a grand day!  
The baby, the Golden Child, is the picture of Perfection--a clone of his beaming father and the pillar of pride for his beautiful Mother.  Of course, I have plans on loving the dickens outta him for all of eternity!
I'm still processing this birth, so I may have left off other details and may come back and add more as I feel, and some of this may be jittery and disconnected.  But here it is.  My real life in my House.

post dated add-ons:  From the time the midwife ruptured membranes 'til the onset of real labor: 6 hours.  From the time of onset of labor 'til the birth 9 1/2 hours.  

Golden Child is on his way!

Last night around 8PM:

Heading up to Golden!
Prayers much-appreciated
for a safe and healthy birth!

~Dawn


Then Dani called and said the contractions
she'd been having all day
were irregular
so she was going to go lay down
and see if they just went away.

She'd call back if they didn't.

I had just showered
and put on scrubs
tied my shoes
and was ready to walk out the door
before that call.

Hmmm
okay I thought,
I'll go rest a bit too--
she'll probably call around 11PM
and then I'll head up there.

I lay down
in my bed
in my scrubs
in my socks
with my head carefully
touching the pillow
so my hair didn't get messy.

Then I woke up
at 3:00 AM
and wondered why the
heck was I still at home?

Rest wouldn't return easily
so I puttered around on the
www
for awhile,
looking at BlackFriday.com
for some deals
until Mr W
talked me back into bed
and off to dreamland
I went again.

I dreamed I missed the birth.
Yikes!

Finally, I just got up
around 6:45am
came down to the kitchen
and started breakfast
turkey dressing
and the rest of the fixings.

We had dinner
uninterrupted...
we did the customary round table
discussion
of what we're thankful for--
Joseph says, "Pumpkin Pie."
Dean says," To be here with my family."
I love him.


It's 8:23PM
and still no baby.
She was 4cm dilated yesterday
morning
before the midwife swept her membranes,
and she's had ctx all day,
but if she went to the hospital
they'd just hook her up to pitocin
and then follow that with
an epidural
and on and on
like dominos
one medical intervention after another.

No, she says,
we'll wait until the Golden child
is ready....

So here we are,
her ctx are on again tonight
but still irregular...
I'll keep you posted.
On the plus side,
if I'm still here
in the morning
there are some killer deals
for Black Friday
that I would love to chase!

Finality

My Journey to the Valley of the Sun
is officially over.
I wrote and wrote and wrote about it
until there was nothing left to say.
And then
I unpacked
my bags
and sighed a sigh
of gratitude.

Lucy, I'm home.

What's it like at a HomeBirth?

I get "the call" at 12:10pm...do I wanna attend a birth today?
Heck yes, I do!
Phone calls are made for kids
a quick shower (like 5 minutes!)
I grab my doula bag, the birth ball
a pack of crackers
one of Mr. W's ice-cold Cola-products
and I am out the door
by 12:30.

I arrive just at 1pm.

The house is busy but relaxed.
Mama-to-Be (A.) is hanging out in the kitchen
smiling, chatting with a friend.
I get briefed by the Midwife
Contractions are 10 minutes apart
A. is 4 cm dilated.

Birth Assistant, Emily motions to me
We have work to do
we get the bedroom ready for
Birth.

We cover the sheets with a plastic liner
in this case it's a new shower curtain liner.
Light purple and shiny.
Then we place another sheet set over that.
And lay a couple of Chux pads down.
We want to keep everything as clean as possible.
Then we fluff the pillows
and fold over the bedcover at the end of the bed.
That's done.

Next, we get the birth kit ready.
We place infant receiving blankets
infant caps
and
the "I was born at home"
tshirt in the infant tub
and cover it with a heating pad.
We want it all to be warm for baby.

We prepare all the instruments
by putting them in a large pot on the stove
and boil them for 20 minutes.

We fill a bowl with ice
and water
and a washcloth
for Mama A.
It'll feel good to her
while she's working so hard in labor
to have a cool cloth on her forehead and neck and shoulders.

We fill a crockpot
with water
and fresh ginger slices
and a washcloth.
Warm compresses
for Mama A. to help
with perineum care after birth.
The ginger helps with swelling.

We get out the O2 tanks
check the regulator and the settings.
We check the Midwife's bag
to make sure she has everything plus some.
Gloves, gauze pads, herbs and tinctures,
it's all in there. Whatever she needs.

We set up the bathroom for Mama A.
We pour witch-hazel on sanitary pads
and put them in a ziplock bag
and tuck them in the freezer.
TO be used by Mama A. after birth
again for swelling and comfort.

We pre-make the Gele' bottle
make sure there are fresh towels
all for Mama A.

We check the Labor tub
the air pressure is low
so we add more air
the water temp is 104o
so we add cool water.
We want it to feel just right
for Mama A.
We check the temp again
Perfect.

Family and Friends
arrive and fill the house with
chatter and excitement
"How's it going?"
"how far along?"
"Is she really in labor?"

Once the set-up is complete
we decide to give the family some time
to just be.
So we leave to go grab a bite to eat
nearby.
Contractions are steady but easy for Mama A.
there's no sense in us just being there.
This is their day.

We climb in the car together
and collectively get on the
same page as we head to
Olive Garden.
We get seated
get our glasses of water with lemon
Place our orders
laugh that we all ordered
the same. exact. thing.
Then the Midwife's cell phone rings!
We hold our breath while reaching for our purses.
We hear her say,
"Yes? How long ago? Was it clear?"
Her water broke.
We won't be staying for lunch afterall.
We cancel the order and head back
to the Mama.
It's 2:20pm.

The mood has changed in the house
when we return.
Mama is now subdued
and her family & friends' moods follow her.

She is focused and breathing
but still smiling.
Her many coaches
encourage
praise
love her.

We give her
many
many
many
drinks.

After a few contractions
she goes to the bathroom
We want her to keep her bladder empty
to give the baby room to move down.

A few more contractions
and verbal cues from Mama
we know she is in transition...
she gets in the warm comforting waters
of the Labor pool...
and her face relaxes
her shoulders drop
as she melts into the water.

Because she is so relaxed
the contractions come quicker
as she breathes thru each one
she decides that leaning on the side of the pool
with her arms
and knees under her
is a great position
so she continues to
breathe with each wave of her uterus.

I am charting each contraction
every two minutes...
while the Midwife listens to fetal heart tones
and Emily checks Mama A.'s vitals.
It's all good.

Mama is leading us all...
she is the center of our world right now
She and her Baby...
Papa M. has come more into action--
it is his voice she wants to hear
his hands she wants to feel
his eyes she looks to for truth
and encouragement.
Her friends rub her shoulders
and arms with aromatherapy lotion
that fills her head with relaxing scents
of lavendar and eucalyptus.

At 3:10 Mama A. lets out a grunt...
and we all smile...
spontaneous pushing!
Yea! She needs no counting or coaching to push
as she listens and obeys her body.
Each wave brings her baby closer to her arms
Mama A. is working hard
those cool compresses are welcomed.

Family and friends are One with the rest of us.
I sit on the only available edge of the bed
and chart chart chart
each heart tone
each grimace
each word Mama says.

Mama decides to use the
Birthing Stool.
Standing in the pool
she says
"It feels so good to stand up!"
Papa covers her with a big warm towel
and she sits on the stool
with her dear friend behind her for support
and the Midwife and Papa at her knees.
Papa is going to catch the baby
with the Midwife's guidance.

Two contractions and
we see the head clearly!
"You're doing great, Mama!"
"Push past the Pain, Push past it!"
She listens and give one huge push--
our own faces are twisted
and teeth are gritted
with hers...
And there's a baby face!
One more push
and there's the rest!
3:41pm.

Mama's face says it all:
Lit up like the 4th of July!
Pure relief rushes over her body.
The Midwife is taking care of Mama A.
Emily is checking out the baby while
kneeling next to Mama A. & Baby.
The cord is still attached and will be for awhile.

The placenta delivers within 10 minutes
then we place the placenta in a bag
and Papa gets to hold his
Son.

We help Mama to the bed.
More drinks.
I am still charting
every single thing.
Baby is getting his first meal.

After Baby has nursed
and Mama has rested for an hour
she gets to the bathroom with help.
Papa is singing "Elmo's Song" to his son.

We quickly start to transform
the bedroom~
let the air out of the labor tub
put away all the "Stuff"
change the bedsheets back to normal.
Since the baby wasn't delivered on the bed
the sheets are not even messed.
But we put them in the washer anyway.

We move
move
move
quickly
to get it all put away--with the mantra
"leave no trace that a baby was born here"
we want it spotless.

The Baby Exam time arrives
and together Emily and the Midwife
do the accessment together
while I am still charting.
It's time to weigh this boy!
"What do ya think?" comes out the cue
"7.4" "7.10" I say "7.7"
Emily places the baby on the scale
6.10 !!
Wow! yea!
Who cares?--He's beautiful!!

It's Mama's turn for an exam
Uterus is firm
a small slight tear that will heal
perfectly on it's own
with rest and comfort
Mama's face is relaxed and alert.
"I'm so glad I'm home."

We make Papa some food
and a friend makes a run to
Qdoba
for Mama A. who has decided she is
ready for some good food!
Family and Friends leave.

It's time to go.
We tuck the family into bed
and close the door.

We go back to the car.
Tired.
Satisfied.
Go back to Olive Garden
and review the Birth.
Hugs.
Home.

Little tears
are caught on my cheek
as I drive home.
I just saw a miracle today.

Hot Pizza Dip Appetizer

If you know our Family, you know we enjoy cooking for fun and sharing with friends.
For Turkey Day, Diana caught Dani in action making one of our favorite appetizers: Hot Pizza Dip.

So you will need:
3-8 oz pkgs. of cream cheese
italian seasoning
red & green bell peppers
pizza sauce
mozzarella cheese


Cream together, either with a handheld mixer or spoon the cream cheese and italian seasoning. I also add a little garlic powder.
Then you pour on the pizza sauce evenly over the cream cheese.















Top the sauce with mozzarella cheese--to your liking....Dani also used some mexican blend cheese too, I see.
Top the cheese with the peppers that have been finely chopped.

Then add more cheese. We like lots of cheese in this house.

Then Bake at 350o until the cheese is melted and golden on top, about 12-15 minutes. Serve with chips, or small sliced italian bread. Makes 2 pie dishes full, as you can see from the pic. Now a fun thing I do, is to put the pie dishes in my pie holder, only put a water-filled pie dish on the bottom with a floating candle lit under it, to keep the top one warm. We didn't do that this time, but it's festive and works well.