best of 2009 Pt 1

Homebirths

Dani's PG

Spring!

Thanks! Nan & Kelly!

Dakota aka Oprah!

Spring Break!

Moving my Bahooey!

Camping!

Sick Days!

General Conference!

Eight is Great!

She's Edumacated!

Love those nametags!

Boofdog, Nationwide, & Ockword!

The Rocky Mountains!

Spring!

Life!

Water Balloon Fights!

The Crags, 4 miles and some pennies!

David Archuleta!

Saturday Mornings are better with them!

New School!

Barefoot and Pregnant!

Fall in the Rockies!

Did You Think to Pray?

Scene: BYU, Off-Campus Housing.  I'm a brand-new convert to the LDS faith, First day in apartment.

My new roommate was a Masters-degree-seeking student of Microbio-something-or-other, named Kim. 22 years old.  I was 18 and intimidated.
The first night sharing a room together, we say our "good nights", flip off the light.
I get on my knees to pray. I hear her do the same.
I say what I need to say, and am up in my bed within a few minutes.
I see Kim is still kneeling,
but it had been a long day, and I was tired, so I roll over and go to sleep.

I wake up hours later
and see she is still on her knees!
"Oh my goodness. She must have alot to say to her Heavenly Father! I am so lame! I will try harder the next time I pray to really think about my prayers!"

The next night, the same thing, we say our "good nights", flip off the light, and hit our knees.
This time, I make sure my prayer is more meaningful.  Still, when I am finished, I know she is still on her knees!  I lay there waiting to see how long she will take to say her prayers. 
I fall asleep before she is finished.

The third night, and fourth night are no different. 
I try to make my prayers even more earnest,
praising, repenting, pleading--
I wanted to be better or at least be as good as Kim--
seeing that she was being carried off in a vision
or something!

Still, as I finish up, and get into bed,
there kneels my roommate at her bedside!
I am thinking,
"She is going to be translated in the night!
She is so righteous! I am so unworthy to be here!"

Because of our different schedules,
we never see each other all day long.
Not until Sunday morning,
do we even have a chance to visit,
as we're getting ready for Church.

So we're standing at the long bathroom counter
in front of the mirrors,
primping ourselves,
when Kim says, very non-chalantly,
"Oh, can you do me a favor?"
I said, "Sure."
"The next time you see me on my knees longer than, like, 5 minutes, would you just tap me or something? I keep falling asleep while I'm praying and my knees are killing me!"

A Full Moon Homebirth

~Birth is not only about making babies, Birth is about making mothers--

strong, competent, capable mothers who trust themselves and know their inner strength.~

It's just after 5 am this morning.
I've been home from a birth for about 30 minutes.
Mr. W was getting tready to leave for work
just when I was coming upstairs.

I'm just glad I got to see him.
I wasn't here when he came home from work.
And I missed him.
So now, I am tired but awake with time to reflect.

The birth was beautiful.
First time Mom, at 37 years old,
labored so well. so confidantly.
Mostly in the labor pool
sometimes on the toilet
sometimes on her hands and knees
Always with her sweetheart near.

Towards the end
the delivery got intense--
 a very big baby was on the way
and while the Midwife and Emily
worked on the birthing part of the Mom,
I was at her side,
talking to her quietly,
while she squeezed the life outta my hands
and her eyes penetrated my own with deep
 questions:
"Am I okay?" her eyes asked mine.
"Yes, you're fine. You're almost done!" I answered outloud.
"Is my baby okay?" her gaze asked again.
"Your sweet baby girl is doing so well! She will be in your arms
before you know it!" I replied.

Labor is such hard work.

After the delivery,
Mom was in the bathroom,
while I stood nearby
in case she needed help--
I heard her voice crack a little and
poked my head around the corner--
Mom was feeling emotional,
 little tears fell down her cheeks,
as she said to me,
"thank you so much. I couldn't have done it without you.
I didn't think I could keep going on, until I looked into your eyes.
Then I knew I could. Thank you."
I rubbed her shoulders and told her
that she is a very strong woman
and she could've and would've done
just fine in any case.
And that's the truth.


I drove home this morning
with a full moon shining above
my Rocky Mountains.

My heart is full.
NOW, I can go to sleep.

Is Your Tree still up?

I'm sitting in my front livingroom
yesterday afternoon
in my pj's...
and just then,
3 days AFTER Christmas,
I really just sat there
and enjoyed it...
all the lovely green boughs
and ribbons, ornaments,
little white twinkly lights
and the creamy white angel
blink
blink
blinking
at the top
and the deep burgundy velvet
tree skirt
with it's puffy white felt doves
circling the bottom.

The Season is nearly over
and it is a bittersweet notion
that this time next week
all of the holiday decorations
will be packed away
and life will be back to same ol
same ol.

I loved Christmas this year.
It was the best one we've had
in a long long time...
I love that my grown children
still want to come to my house
and spend their holidays together!

We laughed until our sides ached!
Hanging out in the kitchen,
baking, mixing, story-telling.
Whispering back and forth
about Christmas surprises--
oh, it was just a slice of
heavenly peace
for me.

I have dear friends
who take the tree down
even on Christmas day...
they are plum.wore.out.
and to take down the tree
signifies the end of the holiday stress
they've been feeling.
I get that.
I think I may have even done that a few times
in my life too.
"Thank goodness it's over, time to get back to real life!"

But this year was different.
It was sweet
with the many homecomings
and celebrating this new little baby in the family
really made it special.

So I'm not anxious to take the trees down
or the garland,
weaving in and out
and up and down the bannisters...
let them stay for a few more days
I say!
The magic of the season is not lost on me
this year.
We were filled with it
indeed smothered in it!
Yes, I was busy as ever--
shopping
cooking
cleaning--
but today,
I am still in my pj's
resting and reflecting,
with a full heart
not ready to go
"back to normal"
this year.

Once I went into a home
where the Christmas tree
was up in July!
The mother in the home was old
enough to be my mother,
and I stood there looking at the
fully-decorated tree
wondering why it was still up.
Then I looked around the rooms
and saw literally dozens of nativities
displayed everywhere.
Oh, I thought,
this has a deep meaning--
perhaps it is the message to keep
Christmas in your heart all year round?
So when the sweet woman came to greet me
I asked,
"How long has your Christmas tree been up?"
"Seven years.", she smiled.
"Wow, is that to remind you to keep the Christmas Spirit all year 'round?"
"Oh heavens, no!", she laughed. "Nobody wants to take it down!"

So what about YOU?
Is your tree still up?

The Sacred Altar of the Home

Heavenly.
Recently, I met a lovely, enlightened woman,
who described her dinner table
as
"sacred".
That really struck my heart.
It's true.
Of all of the furniture in my home,
it is the dinner table
that has become consecrated
to the building up of our
Family.

All the work my husband does
to provide for us
so I can prepare and serve
meals to my family
has a grander meaning
when I see this table with
eternal eyes.

It may be dotted with
strawberry jam,
maple syrup,
bits of salt and pepper,
bread crumbs and cheerios--
But that food is a blessing to us.

At times,
there are pages of homework,
library books,
gym shorts,
church books,
pens, pencils, crayons,
even a dog leash
laying about the long wooden slats
that have been carefully carved
and crafted into our dinner table.
Those things are also blessings to enrich
our lives,
as individuals
and as a family.

To find it completely cleaned,
with nothing on it,
is to find it right before dinner,
or right after dinner...
but usually
it is laden with the stuff of our
family's
comings and goings.

We dedicate it daily
to serving our family's needs.
We eat at it,
Serve one another around it,
laugh around it,
gather our friends to it
and
Pray to our Heavenly Father at it,
asking for His Love to protect us
and guide us
and teach us to be better people.

This Christmas Season was no different--
I prepared my family's favorite treats
with my sweet daughter-in-love, Tisha
by my side.
We chopped
and stirred
and mixed
and tasted
and Served.
And we loved.

The smells coming from the kitchen
pulled the family
from the corners of the house
to "see what's cookin'"--
everyone eager to taste and share
the bounty.

We pull out our best red dishes
with the moose
and bear
on them
and we sit in our favorite wooden seats
waiting for all to be filled,
even when we have to "go find" the missing person--
we wait.
Then we pray.
We express our gratitude
for all that we have
and acknowledge His hands in everything.
And once again,
dedicate our hearts to Him
and one another.

Looking at my dinner table
with eternal eyes--
fills my heart with joy!
It is not a new or even nearly new
expensive wood--
it's just a long oak table
with dents
and scratches
from years of daily use.

It is MY altar.
It is where I bring the fruits of my labors
to serve
my family
and my Heavenly Father.

Now, go look at your dinner table with new eyes...
tell me if yours isn't as divine as mine.
I'm sure it is.

Yeah WE are THAT Family....

just a snippet into our day today
as we visited Dani's ward
in Golden for the baby blessing...
it shouldn't be a "ward"
but a "branch"
because
our family
plus Mr. Idaho's family
doubled the attendance today.


While the Sacrament was being passed:
the water tray comes to Dean
who is sitting next to my left,
he takes a cup
drinks it
and gulps so loudly
that Mr. Idaho can hear it at the pulpit
from where we are sitting,
third row from the back.
::: Laughter::::


With the speakers
and musical number
finished,
and 20 minutes left on the
schedule
and the only Priesthood conducting
was the 2nd Counsellor
and the EQP, Mr. Idaho--
the 2nd Counsellor
said he's always wanted to sing
his favorite hymn--
"all seven verses"--
to "A Poor Wayfaring Man of Grief"--
to which my 14 yo let out her thoughts
uncensored:
"You're kidding!"
::::Laughter filled the Chapel::::
and THEN the 2nd Counsellor added,
"Standing up, please."
To which my Deano laughed,
"No Way!"
:::More Laughter::::
Dani leaned over to me,
"I have stupid siblings."

I don't know if they will ban us forever from coming back,
or if they're hoping we come back every Sunday
just for the entertainment.
If you can't be a good example
at least be a horrible warning.

So that was our Sunday...
how was yours?

Christmas Day 2009

I'm alive and well.
Worn out.
Lots to tell.
Lots of pictures.
Need sleep.
Be Back Soon.

Christmas Birthdays

Alot of babies are trying to do their parent's a
huge tax favor
by coming before the end of the year.
There was a birth on
Saturday.
And another yesterday morning,
And yet another later in the day.
We still have one more to come.

When I was a kid
I used to wish my birthday was on
Christmas Day.


As I was driving to the early morning home birth,
it was beautiful.
The landscape was inspiring--
rolling snow-covered hills,
twinkling Christmas lights
beaming from houses and trees
along the way...
so lovely.

The home itself was decked out
for the holidays--
the tree, the lights, even a little pink stocking
with a little "L" on it--
to celebrate a new sweet little girl
arriving in that family!
It just seemed so perfectly suited
for the birth of a child.

For many of us,
we are celebrating the birth of
the Babe in Bethlehem...
the Lord, Jesus Christ
as we light the lights
fill our homes with lovely carolls,
enjoy our family and friends
with gifts and yummies--
reaching outward to show
an inward
gratitude
for the Gift of God...
that began with a little baby
lying in a manger.
But for these families
who have the blessing of a new child
fresh from heaven-
I just can't think of a sweeter gift.
And for these mothers,
they may be relating to Mary
in a new way this Christmas season.

I watched "The Nativity"
with Dani last weekend...
she commented that she has a whole new
appreciation
for what Mary went through---
"I wouldn't want to ride a donkey
while pregnant. All those miles!"
"Can you imagine giving birth in a stable? ugh."
And I was thinking of Joseph too...
We don't know if he had a donkey too,
or if he had to walk the whole way.
I love Joseph's example.

I love the blessing I have been given
to be doing what I'm doing...
helping in any way,
a woman give birth
is the most rewarding thing I can do,
other than being a Mother myself.
I love it.

So Happy Birthday, all you December babies!

Twas the Weekend Before Christmas

It's Saturday,
the last Saturday before Christmas.
And I am wide awake at 5 o'clock in the morning!
Visions of sugar plums aren't the only things
dancing thru my head!

I have got stuff to do
as I prepare for the whole family
to be together this coming week!
David Scott and Tisha are on their way
from Boise
arriving here tomorrow!
Dani and Mr. Idaho  and the Golden Child,
will be here Monday
and Deano joins us Christmas Eve--
along with Brother and Sister Boise (Mr. Idaho's folks)
and their yahoos!

I am so stinking excited,
I just can't even sleep!
Aside from meal plans,
I am also getting things lined up for some fun activities:
the Whole Hee Haw Gang is going  snow tubing,
and we're having a White Elephant gift exchange
and a family picture taken!
We are going to be busy!

Plus, there are 4 babies who've yet to arrive!
And we're expecting snow this next week!
I wonder if we'll have a White Christmas,
like the Boise Famlies want?

My Honey-DO list is long too.
And the missionaries are coming for breakfast.
Is it too early to rouse the troops
and get this show on the road??

It's the last weekend before Christmas!
I can't wait!

Our Family Council

Sometimes
Sometimes
This Momza has to grab the reins
to harness in her family.
Things start going amuck around here

and I start looking for the EXIT signs.

This week has been building up
to one of those
Sometimes...
the kids in my house
showed signs of alien-abduction:
forgetting all good manners,
arguing like OJ Simpson's lawyers ("You must aquit if the glove don't fit!)
and in all other ways
behaving as though they've been raised by wolves.
In Wyoming,
because we all know how they are.

Mornings have been uncivilized...
like prisoners of Azkaban
they begin the day by stating their demands
and clanking their cups on the sideboards,
Whining turns into outright fussing
and fussing mutates into
every manner of rotten-ness...
and there I am in the middle
wracking my brain trying to
say the "magic spell"
that will turn these would-be criminals
into law abiding citizens.

We've had moments of peace--
usually when their mouths are full
or their noggins are resting on their wee pillows
but lately,
I tell you what,
there's been awhole lotta fussin' goin on.
Afterschool has become less
"I'm so glad to see my children,
the offspring of my soul--
to
"Shoot! It's 4pm--they'll be here any minute!
Where can I hide until the madness is over?"

So last night,
I. had. had. it.
"FAMILY COUNCIL AFTER DINNER!"
I announced to the whole house,

loud enough for every unruly ear to hear.

Oh that got everyone's attention...
the "Ugh-Mom's-gonna-lecture-us" moan began.
And guess what?
I didn't care.
I was determined.
In the name of Survival
and Self-preservation
I was thinking
time to take control of this wayward Circus!

So they dragged their guilty bums to the sofa
and laid about like they have no backbones--
just skin-covered forms of children...
I normally pull out a diningroom chair
and sit in the middle of the room,
but this time
I stood up
in front of them
like a force to be reckoned with!

I pulled out my cheatsheet--
the notes I had made earlier,
that had the outline I wanted to follow--
and said
"Is everyone having a good time? Do you like coming home
to a bunch of grouchy people? ...something's off-track around here, and
we need to take a look at what's going on around here.
Does anyone know what respect means?"
Ari raises her hand--she ALWAYS raises her hand--because she is 8. Nuff said.
"Respect is when you are kind to others. It's an IB Attitude. And our house needs to be an IB house not a regliar house! An' I go to an IB school and it's great! An' if I went to a regliar school, I would not like it. But I sit next to Iliana an' she doesn't act like an IB kid, an' Mrs. Z says Iliana has to sit by her at the front until she learns her IB attitudes. SO WE need to be an IB Family!!" (hands waving wildly, body contortions all over the loveseat, where she ends up with her legs wrapped around her neck)

That's right, Ari. We show respect for others when we are kind and when we care about them. We listen to them. We may not agree with them, but we don't shout and we don't hit, but we listen. And we are careful about their feelings, right?

Okay, let's talk about HABITS...Joseph, what's a habit?
He grimmaces.  He's boycotting in silence the meeting as a whole.  He's 10.
Ari raises her hand again.
Okay, Ari, what is a habit?

"Something you do all the time."

That's right, it can be something you do at school too...what's some habits, or things you do every day at school?

"We have bell work--we get 10 seconds to hang our coat, and like 10 seconds to pick our lunch, and we haveta take a seat and do spelling words."

Does anyone ever say they don't wanna do it?
She nods her head, "Oh yeah. Marcus. Every. Day!"
And what happens if he doesn't do it.
"He's in TRRRRRoubbble!"
Does he end up doing it?
Raising her eyebrows, "Oh YEAH."
And who made up the bell work?  Who taught your class how to do that stuff?"

"Mrs. Z. She's so AWESOME! I LOVE HER!"

OK, thanks Bee.  Next I wanna talk about another word
Responsibility.
Dara, what's that mean?
The 14 year old favors a zombie...and mumbles out

"Stuff you have to do."

OKay, and let's think about that for a minute.
Can anyone tell me
What is Dad's number one Responsibility?
Silence.
Dad, what's your first responsibility?

"To take care of my family."

That's right.
We all have responsibilites--
Ari interrupts, "WE HAVETA DO OUR PART!"
she is half-laying on the sofa, upside down.

So we talked about it a bit longer
until I got a verbal commitment
from the whole heehaw gang
that they would try harder.

Hugs all around and they were off like rockets!

And I felt cleansed.
I let go of the reins and sighed relief.

The course correction had been made,
we may just have this Circus
on the right track again.

My Closest, My Finest Friend

Mr. Krueger's Christmas.
I don't know if it's been televised in many years,
but we own the video of it
and this scene
makes it my favorite Christmas movie...
Jesus Christ is my closest, finest Friend.
When the rest of the world offers no peace
I go to Him,
the Peacegiver
for relief.
As this season gets underway
in full-swing
may we each find a moment
to reflect on the Greatest Gift of all.
Blessings~

Oprah ate this UP!

Alrighty,
I have sunk to a new low
I'm pretty sure.

We ran outta dog food--
you know the Avoderm
we feed the chow-hound, Oprah?
And I ran around town today
got home
and remembered that the dog needed food.

And I had to leave in a minute...
so I'm lookin around the kitchen
thinking:
"What can I feed her that won't cause
gas
diahhrea
or anything else,
BUT will fill her up?"

I picked up a box
and thought,
"yeah, this is good."

I fed Oprah
Cheerios.
MMM
good
and good
for you
too.

Wigs For Babies? Are you Kidding me?

Just when I thought I'd seen it all...


Can you believe it?
Men shave their heads clean,
but we're covering up babies' heads
with polyester hair bands?
If I were dead,
I'd be rolling in my grave.

I would like to thank Mom-Babe and Motherboard...

 and everyone who voted for me in the MMB Academy...


If you go to the Mormon Mommy Blogs homepage, and read down a bit you might see where they invited others to become a card-carrying member of the MMB Contributors board thingy.
They asked interested parties to write them an email and list their credentials, desires, favorite ice cream, shoe size and Why you or I would want to be on the board thingy.
I jumped at the chance, and tossed my cockeyed Momza hat into the ring with a wish and a prayer and a long, rambling paragraph about why I would love to be on their MMB board thingy which included my hopes, dreams, desires, Granma's maiden name, and every relevant/ irrelevant detail in my little Momza's House.
Truth be told here folks, I read the email three times and wondered outloud what in the world I could really contribute to MMB that would be authentic or valuable.
I sent it off anyway.
THEN, I got an answer.
And it was YES.
And I screamed outloud and scared the kids!
ACK!
And then real life smacked my dilirious head
and I had to make dinner!
But I was SMILING while I was making dinner!
I fought spontaneous combustion on account of my overwhelming joy!
I am so stinkin happy!
My kids asked me what I'll be doing--
I have no freaking idea!
But whatever it is,
just the thought
 made my Shepherd Pie taste delicious!

I'm IN!

Keeping it Real

So I just got a notice saying an article of mine has been published on DivineCaroline....
It seems that
I am all that and a bag of chips.
Who knew? 
Go check me out.

Sleeping in the Dirt

R E S P E C T

While I've been running up and down
the Front Range
that separates the Golden Child
and
me,
the house has been on
Auto-Pilot...
Mr W. has been great about laundry
thankgoodness.
And the dishes have been getting
mostly done...
mostly because for whatever reason
that includes lazy children, escapes my noggin--
pots and pans are set aside
for what I am guessing no make that hoping,,
magical kitchen elves to come
at night and do them--
or for a tired Momza
to...why not? It's not like I'm busy or anything!

BUT, the kids' bathroom
turned into a WaterPark/Beach Blanket Bingo
while I was gone,
and there are no less than 220 nekkid Barbies
filling the two sinks and bathtub!

Yesterday morning:
Momza: Joseph, go brush your teeth before school.
Joseph: I can't. Ari's Barbies are all over the bathroom; in my sink!
Momza: Bee, go up and get all your Barbies outta the bathroom, so Joseph can brush his teeth. Now.
Ari, immediate whinage ensues: "Aww. You don't respect me. You respect Joe more than me!
Momza: What?
Ari: You treat me like a servant!
Momza, trying not to laugh: Now.

*Note to self: Show more respect to Ari.

Ten Days Of Christmas Quiz

 Since I've been running up and down the Front Range of the Rocky Mountains almost every day since December 2nd, I am stealing this from Marilyn.
 

1. Egg nog or hot chocolate? Both, but I like the Silk-nog rather than the calorie-laden real stuff.  But can I have extra marshmallows in my hot cocoa?

2. Does Santa wrap the presents, or just set them under the tree? Mostly wrapped, unless it's a odd present like a bike...then it just gets a huge bow.

3. Colored or white lights on the tree/house? White lights on the indoor trees, colored when Mr. W hangs them outside.

4. Do you hang mistletoe? Sometimes.  My teenagers ask for it all the time, so not all the time.

5. When do you put up your decorations?    First weekend after Turkey day.



6. What's your favorite holiday dish? oh man, I like them all! Warmed cranberry brie.  Cranberry salsa.

7. Favorite holiday memory as a child. The year I rec'd my yellow bike with the white banana seat!

8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa? I was probably near 11 before I finally admitted to myself that there was no Santa...I enjoyed the whole idea of him!


9. How do you decorate your Christmas tree(s)?  Well one is the Family tree full of individual ornaments that Granma Barb sends us each year.
It has a grapevine Star at the top, raffia bows, red sashes in the boughss, and is 9 ft tall. Family presents under there. The other is my froo-froo tree...light pink balls, light sage green balls, deep crimson, and gold balls, crimson ribbon, and an angel at the top. Santa presents under there.


10. Do you open gifts on Christmas Eve? yes, just one of our choosing. It tides the kids over...and no, it is not pjs.  My mom used to do that, and I hated it as a kid.  What a let down! lol

11. Snow! Love it or dread it? I grew up in Miami, Florida...have called Colorado home for 10 years-- love the snow!


12. Ice skate? Can you do it? I have tried it. once. Unfortuately, I was not like Dorothy Hamill or MIchelle Kwan, but more like Oscar the Grouch on wheels.

13. Do you remember your favorite gift? Oh I can't say!  I love them all!


14. What is the most important thing about the holidays for you? Being together as a family. Cheesy, I know, but the absolute truth.

15. Favorite holiday dessert? All of it!

16. What is your favorite holiday tradition? White Elephant Gift Exchanges!

17. What tops your holiday tree? 1- Grapevine Star 2- Angel

18. Which do you prefer, giving or receiving? Both are good. Both are favorites!

19. What is your favorite Christmas song? Angels we have heard on High. AND I LOVE the Messiah.  AND I always cry over "O Come All Ye Faithful."  I don't know why, I just do. AND Silver Bells reminds me of my childhood. 

20. Candy canes? Absolutely...we had 4 dozen on the tree 2 days ago...now just the ones outta kids' reach are left= 4.

Scripture: Luke 2.

Anyone Can Grow A Garden

Altho the earth is frozen in these parts,
it is never too late to start thinking
SPRING...
And Spring means Gardening
so let me introduce
LDS Food Storage Seeds.

Check 'em out
and let me know what you think!

They're going to send me a sample kit
and you know I will tell you all about it!

The Spirit of Christmas

And sometimes it rains...

Friday at 4:14am the phone rang.
I was expecting a call--
after all, we have 3 more Mama's due this month.
But it wasn't from the Midwife.
It was Mr. Idaho's Mom
who has been staying with him and Dani
to help out with the new baby.

Dani passed out at home
and was taken away by ambulance
to the hospital.
I listened to every detail
then fending off "panic"
got myself together
and Mr W and I drove up there
to see my girl.

Thoughts, mostly negative,
were like storm clouds in my mind
gathering,
hovering,
building up into tears.

When we arrived at the hospital
I wasn't "okay" until my arms were around
my girl
my lips on her cheeks
my hands holding hers...
they'd already begun running tests
before we got there--
blood tests,
and then while we were there:
x-rays
and a catscan...
looking for bloodclots.

I didn't like this hospital--
they did no hands-on examination.
Just listened to the symptoms
did the tests
and with very little to go on,
prescribed an antibiotic
and sent us home...
with promises to call us when
lab results are in.

Mr W went on to work,
and I went to the kids' little apartment
where Mr. Idaho's (Granma Boise) mom had stayed behind
with the Golden child.

My girl is having a hard time...
her body is not bouncing back
from childbirth--

Dani's recovery is slow.
She is one big Hurt.

I stayed overnight
and took a turn on the
baby-feeding wheel--
because of the Catscan,
Dani couldn't nurse for 24 hours.
So we all took turns at feeding
the baby...
I was first.
He woke up an hour and 45 minutes
after I went to bed. ha!
And then again in two hours
and again in two hours...
I enjoyed getting up with him so much
that I didn't relinquish my post
easily.
With my own children,
I enjoyed those 2am feedings--
just me and my baby
learning each other
while the rest of the world slept.
I loved it.

But then again,
mine weren't near 11 pounds
and hungry every 2 hours.
(and boy! was I ever grateful for sleep last night!)

Dani hadn't had 8 hours of sleep in one shot
since before the baby was born...
the next morning,
her color was back
laughter filled her
and made her giggle and wince
at the same time
because of stitches,
but she looked better.
We have a silly sense of humor
and shared it over the baby.
David Scott called to check on Dani
and asked her if he could call the baby
"Gary" like SpongeBob Squarepants' pet snail
and asked if Dani was gonna teach him to
"Meow" too?
So the rest of the day,
Dani and I were "meowing" at the baby.
Ridiculous, I know.
Childish, I know.
Fun! Totally!
We joked and giggled
and ate Granma Boise's banana bread.
She rested and cared for her aching body.
This body has taken a beating lately--
it feels foreign to her.
She wonders if it will ever be "hers" again.


By late afternoon
it was time to go home...
and tears surfaced in my girls' eyes.
Having your Mom nearby is
comforting
healing...
I knelt by her bedside
and said
I knew that this was hard for her,
that this isn't what she expected--
but it will pass.
And soon she will be up and about
and back in charge of her home
and her baby.
And the longer lesson will show
when she is in the circle of other women
and "birth stories" are shared--
she will have a greater understanding
with those whose stories are not all happy
and sunshiney and rosey...
she will have a greater empathy and compassion
when they share their struggles too.

Tears began to fall like rain drops...
I know becoming a Mother is hard--
the aches and pains,
the fleshiness and awkwardness
of full breasts
and tenderness everywhere...
lack of sleep distorts everything too.
The celebration of childbirth
with it's fireworks and sunshine
can sometimes give way
to a sky of rainclouds
and periods of rain
before the rainbows appear.

Storms may gather above
and hide the sun for a while,
but eventually the clouds let go
the rain falls
and something good grows because of it...
A Mother.

All Scrubbed Up and Nowhere to Go

I went to bed last night,
with the feeling that
I would be getting a call.
Since Dani's birth last Wednesday,
and getting caught up on some sleep
and laundry
I was ready.

The call came at 3:14am
this morning.
I showered and put my scrubs on--
which let me just say
that I could wear my scrubs
every day for the rest of eternity,
no kidding.
They should not be called
"scrubs"
but
"comfies"
because.

So I went out to the BMW
and hoped it would start in
sub-below temperatures
and punched in the address
on my GPS
to send me in the right direction.

Well my GPS took me
on the scenic route...
seriously, I had to drive with my
brights on
in case wildlife poked out
on the snow-covered 2-lane backroad
I was driving.

I knew the area I was going to
and would've never taken
the way this GPS was guiding me,
but,
you know,
it's 4 am at this time
and that little GPS voice
is coaching me along
and I decided to trust it.

It took me nearly 45 minutes
to get to the Mama's house,
where had I gone the way
I know,
it would've taken 20.

Mama A.'s dilated to 5cm
but isn't sure she wants a homebirth
this go-around with child number 5.
Their family just moved into this house,
they just adopted a toddler,
and
she homeschools
-- she is plum.wore.out.

I let the Midwife visit with Mama A.
privately.
Having a natural birth is as much
emotional as it is physical.
If Mama thinks she can
she can.
If Mama is too tired to think
then she needs other options.

While Mama A. is contemplating
her options,
I help pick up the house--
a little sweeping
a few dishes
fold some blankets
straighten couch cushions...
just to keep me busy
and awake.

Emily arrives--
I love it when she arrives to the births.
She has a great energy
and we balance each other really well.
Of course, I had to share Dani's birth,
and how wonderful that experience was
for me, for her, for mankind as I know it!

Mama A.'s mother-in-law arrives,
and Mama A.'s hubby relates that
Mama A.'s feeling like she'd rather
go to the hospital and have a medicated birth
than a home birth.
We all sympathize with her.
The Midwife checks her once more--
6cm dilated and stretchy.
She could do this very quickly
if she wanted.
But she's in bed
and she's tired and doesn't feel she can.

So we smile, hug and wish her well
as Emily and I pack up
hug the Midwife goodbye--
she'll be going with her to the hospital,
and drive home in our unused scrubs.

I'm home before the kids even
have to get up for school.
I greet the Boofus who slogs outta the bathroom
with sleepy eyes and bedhead--
"are you leaving for a birth Mom?", he asks.
"No, Scooter, just coming home from one."

Only I didn't have a birth this morning--
I would've loved to have been a part of a birth
today,
but that wasn't my choice.
And this stuff happens once in awhile.
Not often,
I've certainly never had this--
but as the Midwife says,
We're so lucky we have choices in our country.

I glance at the clock,
it's 7:45am
Mama A. should be about ready to push
by now--
which means a new little baby girl
is about to take her first Colorado breath
this frosty December morning,
where it is just two degrees.

And I'm lounging around in my scrubs
with nowhere to go.

Christmas Devotional Throw-down

 I turned on the fireplace, made hot cocoa with marshmallows, turned on the Christmas tree lights, shut the blinds, passed out blanket throws..."creating" the mood...


From the TV:
"Live!
From Temple Square in Salt Lake City,
the First Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
presents
The 2009 Christmas Devotional
featuring the Mormon Tabernacle Choir
and inspirational messages from
President Deiter F. Uchtdorff
President Henry B. Eyring
and
President Thomas S. Monson..."


From the Momza:

"Okay guys! It's ON!  Everyone come down stairs!
Get off the computer,
turn off the other TV,
go get Daisie out of her room and tell her to come up!
Come on guys! It's starting!
Hurry!
--what? No, we just ate...come sit down.
Get outta the kitchen...(waving hands wildly)
c'mon guys, they're sayin' the opening prayer!
SHHHH! (finger to lips)
Turn it up, k?
I can't hear it.
Sit down, Joseph.
No, not under the Christmas tree,
right there. (pointing to floor in front of TV)
One, Two, Three...
now, be quiet and listen to the beautiful music!
--where ya going, Bee?
No, no you cannot go upstairs right now.
This is important!
The Apostles are going to speak to us
after the singing
and you need to listen!
I said, Apostles! Apostles of Jesus Christ, dang it!
Sit down and be quiet!
Get your feet off your sister.
Sit up.
Lay down.
Listen.
Listen.
Listen.
Shhhhh.

(Choir finishes singing)
--Where's Joseph? where'd he go?  Joseph? Joseph?
(from the bathroom: "I'm in here.")
That's the third time you've gone to the bathroom.
Ari informs:  "He's not in the bathroom, he's laying in the hall playing with his Legos."
Come here, Joseph, right now!
Joseph, pointing to TV: "Well this is borrrrrrrrringggg. Why do I haveta watch it? I hate that loud singing."
 Just sit down, right now, or you'll be grounded to your room after it's over for the rest of the day. And I mean it.

Closing Prayer:  I hear music from a video game coming from the loft pc...the youngest are nowhere to be found. The oldest 3 are sleeping on the sofa, one on top of another.

I just loved the Christmas Devotional, didn't you?

And You Think Your Kids Are Weird??

 

          Avocados are wonderful things...

 They're Good for those fatty acids,

facials,

and my favorite

Guacamole!

But, in our house,

the real treasure

is what's

Inside...

BUDDIES!

Yes, that's right--

my kids have named

the avocado pits

"Buddies"...

it started

about 5 years ago.

I don't know how.

I don't know why.

But this is the absolute truth:

the youngest two

love

love

love

avocado pits...

and they put them in water,

carry them around,

and in a very seriously demented

manner,

call them

"Buddies".

I asked Ari why the baggy of water?

"To clean them off,

in case we move to a house

where we can plant it,

it'll be clean."

Un-hunh.

Okay.

And these are the people I hope

to take care of me

when I'm old and

start drooling

on my pillow.

Traditions

While I was up north
doing what I could for
Dani, Brad & Garrett
last week,
my sweet Mr Wonderful and his shadow,
the Boof-dog
got out the Christmas tree
and all fixin's
so we could put up our tree
when I got home Saturday.

Boof-dog had the patience to
hook up all the lights
on the tree
when Mr W did not.

They assembled it
right in the center
of the family room.

And there it stood
lit up
nekkid
until last night.

We have small traditions
in our family...
neither of us had big
family traditions
when we met
so we've developed our own.

Regarding the Tree,
there is a story behind one of our traditions:
When Mr W and I met
it was the week before Christmas.

I wanted to give him a gift
but not too personal
since we had only met thru
the internet (another long story--not Match.com/Harmony.com or any other .com),
and visited on the phone--
but I wanted it to be special.
He had said in a phone conversation that he hadn't
had his own tree in many years
as he lived overseas
and came back to the States to share the holidays
with his father in Montana.
So I bought him a dozen handmade ornaments,
so he could at least have something to put on
his step-mom's tree.
Cheesy, I know.
But if you've been around here
for any length of time,
you know,
I am all about cheese.

That year, 1997,
a  Christmas song came out on the radio--
I told Mr W about it,
but I didn't know who sang it
or even the title,
but everytime I heard it
I just got all choked up.
Mr W called a radio station
and they told him it was
"Mary, Did You Know?"
by Kenny Rogers and Wynonna Judd.
But he didn't tell me.

Anywho,
the first time I met him,
he said he'd brought me some gifts,
as I was departing.
I hadn't told him I too, had a gift
for him.
He handed me a little gift-wrapped box
and inside
was 12 hand-carved wooden ornaments
of little bears and moose
from Montana.
And the "Mary Did You Know?" cd.
I smiled.
And handed him my gift
and told him to open it after I left.

What we didn't know
was that the next Christmas
we would be putting those ornaments
on the same tree together,
listening to that same song.

So every year,
before the kids place their ornaments
on the tree,
they sit back quietly,(under threat of death)
as
we put on that cd
play that song
and together we place our ornaments
on the tree together.

Then they each get their own ornaments
and place them on the tree.

Christmas traditions create memories

that can last forever,

what is a Christmas Tradition

in Your House? 

Every Woman Has the Birth She Needs

See these shoes? These Nikes with their bright orange swoosh?  They started walking the halls of Exempla Lutheran Hospital at 8:10AM on Tuesday morning.  They walked from the car to the Labor & Delivery Floor, then they walked up and down the halls of said hospital, rode on the hospital elevator to the top floor and walked down all the flights of stairs to the bottom and did that again and again. These Nike's rock almost as much as their owner.


 
See this girl, this is my girl. And Mr. Idaho's girl. I have first dibs though. Neener neener.   Meet the owner of the Nike's with the bright orange swoosh.  This is before the nurse ruptured her membranes to bring on labor for a baby that was 10 days overdue.
She even did her hair and makeup--because, as she put it, "I knew Mom would be taking pictures for her blog."  I haveta admit, I did the same thing, only I forgot to be in any pictures. I looked fabli-ous, though, really. 
When the Admitting Nurse asked Dani, on a pain scale of 1-10, when would you like to receive pain medication, Dani replied, "ten".

  
After her membranes had been ruptured for 2 hours, the Midwife said they would have to start talking about pitocin. Dani said "No thanks. I just need more time."  So she walked, and she squatted, and she sat on the birth ball, and she walked some more. And then she took a warm bath that helped kick her into labor.

She is 7 cm dilated and still on her feet.  But things were getting more intense, so we put her back into the jacuzzi...where she stayed until she was 9 cm dilated. Then she had to get out. And THAT was miserable.  She was comfortable, and coping wonderfully, but this hospital doesn't do water births, so she had to get out. We got her onto the bed, where she kneeled on the edge to help the baby come down easier than on her back. Which, btw, she hated being on her back.  By midnight, she was exhausted.  We all were.

Now this is where my Mother heart is raw and tender. My prayers were constantly for her to have strength to finish this on her own terms. At one point, she said, "I can't do this. I can't do this."  The baby was taking a long time coming down, even after she was fully dilated. Dani continued her breathing rhythm, with Mr. Idaho applying counter-pressure on her hips, and Diana and me at her side, breathing with her, all of us in chorus, praising her efforts and strength.
"You can do this! you ARE doing this! you're amazing Dani!

We're right here. We're so proud of you. Almost done, almost done."

Rubbing her shoulders and arms, applying cool compresses on her neck, and warm compresses on her perineum for her comfort.

All of our actions/thoughts were for her comfort and support.

When she had been pushing about 30-45 minutes, she was in an upright position, leaning back on the bed--she was so tired, and again said,

"I can't do this."

Diana and I were at her feet, rubbing her legs constantly, and I said, "Dani, listen to me, I want you to say: "I CAN DO THIS. Now, say it with me, I can do this. I can do this"--she joined me, and that became her mantra thru several more waves of contractions as she brought the baby down.  Even with tears, she continued,"I can do this, I can do this..." and we all in chorus echoed her words back to her, "You can do this, You can do this!"
Mr. Idaho's eyes were teary, as he became one with his wife. He praised her, loved on her, held her, and was at her side and in her ear whispering every good and kind thing in his heart. When she cried, he cried. Her anguish was his. Her relief was his relief.  She leaned on him and he welcomed every bit of it. The bond that was forged in those hours will carry them thru many other trials, I do believe. He continually expressed his love for her and reassured her that she was 'doing great' and in the process of giving her strength, I do believe he increased his own.
I was in awe of my daughter, clearly, this was a large baby, and we knew that going into labor---we suspected between 8-9 pounds.  Which is alot for Dani's 5'5" frame. We gave her honey stix for energy and the midwife gave her oxygen for renewed energy--which totally helped!

When the baby's head finally crowned, Diana, who had been a quiet supporter, spoke up, "Dani, I can see the baby's head-- you're almost done!"

Dani said, "They've been saying that for hours!"

Diana, knowing her sister so well, said, "They lied. I'm not lying. You're almost done!"

And with just a few more strong, focused pushes,

 

Garrett Theodore Bradley came into this world.

Ten Pounds, 8 ounces.

Twenty-one and a quarter inches long!

 See this girl. She's not a girl anymore. She is an Amazing, Strong Mother.

There's a Midwife Mantra that says, "Every woman has the birth she needs."
I love witnessing women give birth--it is such an empowering experience...
 it was humbling and emotional and I am left in complete awe of my daughter's strength and determination.   Dani needed to have this baby on her own terms, and she did indeed have the birth she needed.  I have never been to a birth where the baby weighed over 10 and half pounds!  I don't even know anyone who has...Dani earns the Prize. A gold star. She wins!
What a grand day!  
The baby, the Golden Child, is the picture of Perfection--a clone of his beaming father and the pillar of pride for his beautiful Mother.  Of course, I have plans on loving the dickens outta him for all of eternity!
I'm still processing this birth, so I may have left off other details and may come back and add more as I feel, and some of this may be jittery and disconnected.  But here it is.  My real life in my House.

post dated add-ons:  From the time the midwife ruptured membranes 'til the onset of real labor: 6 hours.  From the time of onset of labor 'til the birth 9 1/2 hours.